TOMORROW I'L BE SINGING

Tomorrow is the night. Monica, Tony, and I will be heading downtown to experience the wonder that is Jesus Christ Superstar. We are going on opening night. I always wonder about attending the opening of a show. Part of me feels that they are going to go out there and give it their all but another side wonders if they may not yet feel quite at home and, therefore, suck a little. No matter, even if the show were to suck it couldn’t help but be awesome. It will be hard to contain myself and not belt out songs. I think it might be a little inappropriate in a theater. This isn't movies in the park.

Let me tell you a little about why I love this show.

1. The music

Tony once told me that while in Texas he asked his friend Matt what Jesus Christ Superstar was. Mat replied, “it’s Jesus but funky.” He couldn’t be more right. This music is FUNKY. You just want to get up and dance and I am so curious to see the dancing that is going to happen tomorrow night.

2. The history

When I was young I didn’t go to church, synagogue, temple, ashram, or any other edifice of religiosity. I was somewhat curious about religion because I was a curious child and a while lot of people seemed to put a lot of stock in it. All the questions I had were answered by my parents to the best of their ability and I considered myself rather well informed.

One day, while looking through my parent’s records I came upon a double album containing the London cast recording of Jesus Christ Superstar. I figured the title was pretty interesting so I put it on. Need I remind you that it was FUNKY? I think not. So I sat there and listened to the music with the liner notes in hand reading along and learning the story. I think that experience was my first real exposure to the story of the final days of Jesus. Because of this musical being my teacher I was very confused when I heard that Judas was considered to be the worst of all worst people. His character in the play is very sympathetic and he totally has the best songs. Jesus is a little whiny. These facts may be why the musical was controversial.

Later in life I read the Bible and was pleasantly surprised to find bits and pieces of the words from JC Superstar dispersed throughout. I felt pretty good about the fact that the play was nice and true to the text…ish

3. The clothes

Now, since my only seeing of this show has been through the 1973 Norman Jewison film that is my only concept of the clothes. However, anytime Roman guards look like village people, King Herod appears to be a coked out movie producer, and Jesus and pals are total hippies I can’t help but love it.

4. The music

Yeah I know I covered this already but really, this stuff is FUNKY

I can’t wait.

1. Dear I thought I'd drop a line/ The weather's cool/ The folks are fine/ I'm in bed each night by nine

2. Sitting down by my window/ Looking at the rain/ Sitting down my window/ All around I felt it/ All I could see was the rain

3. Cato play with my head/ I won’t know the difference/ if we’re living in the novelist/ or statistician/ Oh oh oh. Cato As A Pun, of Montreal. Identified by Monica

4. See the storm set in your eyes/ See the torn twist in your side/ I wait for you. With or Without You, U2. Identified by, Danielle

5. I’m a poor boy born in a rut/ Some say my manners aren’t the best/ Some of my friends have been in a whole lot of trouble/ Some say I’m no better than the rest

I NEVER HAVE TO READ IT AGAIN

I finished War and Peace the other day. I was thoroughly unmoved. Although the book certainly had its strong points. Tolstoy was examining relatively recent events that shaped his world and he did so with grace. I actually found the War sections of the book more interesting than I thought I would. Regardless, I was more drawn to the Peace parts and the interconnections between various families. At the same time, I didn’t find either topic particularly moving. I much prefer Dostoyevsky's proletariat people to Tolstoy's aristocrats. If you haven’t read this book and plan to please be aware that there are some spoilers ahead. They come very soon in-fact. Stop reading unless you don't care.

In the footnotes of one of the first chapters, I was told that Pierre and Natasha would be the main characters in the book. Knowing how Russian Literature of the period tends to work, I assumed that this meant they would be love interests. I wasn’t surprised to find that the entire book led up to them getting married. The sad thing was that their marriage seemed to ruin both of them as interesting people. However, since they get together at the end of the book, you don’t have to suffer through much of their downfall.

Natasha was a trip in her own right. A beautiful wonderful girl whom everyone loved, she found her stimuli in singing, dresses, boys, and the occasional hunt. She was boy crazy from the beginning and, I believe, was about 9 or so when the book started. I think the boy was at least 16. I don’t really remember; it was thousands of pages ago. I think Pierre was in his late twenties at the beginning of the story. I know that differences in age were a different story in those times and that in some places they still aren’t as big a deal as I think they are. Even so, it grossed me out and made me hope that my supposition that they were to be wed would prove to be false. Throughout the book this girl did nothing but talk about boys, fall in love with Borris, go to balls, fall in love with Andrew, wait for Andrew to return, fall in love with some other Prince whose name I can’t remember but he got limbs cut off and then died, fall into a deep depression because Andrew left her, Reunite with Andrew on his deathbed and rekindle their affection, mourn his death (which was necessary so her brother could marry his sister), and fall in love with/marry Pierre (Andrew’s best friend). Those happenings took about seven hundred pages.

The other eight hundred pages were about the Napoleonic wars. While that information was relatively interesting, I could have read a history book and been spared some of the fluff. Then again, I wouldn’t have got the philosophical discussion about the nature of man and the nature of war. The idea that I found the most fun was how the people who plan for and execute wars never are truly in charge of them because victory depends primarily on the mood of the people on the front lines. It is a rather obvious premise, but interesting to explore nonetheless. The discussion of why certain battles were won and others lost was also of interest. Those looking back on history claim to see the planning and foresight that goes into turning the tides of war and tend to give generals too much credit and ignore all the chance occurrences that truly drive the course of action. It made sense to me.

I could have got all that in about three hundred pages or so. Maybe four if I want a lot of detail. No matter, I’m done now and I never have to read it again. After my first attempt succumbed to boredom I was determined that my second would be a success. I refuse to be conquered by another piece of literature. I will not have another Ulysses.

I am now reading The Areas of my Expertise, by John Hodgeman (sorry Monica I know I was supposed to give it to you). Something totally made up that I don’t even have to read in order sounded pretty good. It is.

1. Down in the cellar in the Boho zone/ I went looking for some sweet inspiration/ Oh well, just another hard time and with Negro affectations

2. I just wanna fuck bad bitches/ all them nights I never had bitches/ Now I’m all up in that ass bitches/ Mad at your boyfriend ain’t you

3. Well showing how it used to be/ So hard/ This hard /Used to get those kicks for free/ But now I’m towing the line

4. Oh we could rock/ Or we could bomb/ Or we could try/ Like super hard.

5. Waiting/ On a Sunday afternoon/ For what I read between the lines/ Your lies. Interstate Love Song, Stone Temple Pilots. Identified by Johnny Yen

THE ABSENCE OF FAITH

Lakeiya and I just had a conversation about faith. She has a lot of faith. I have none. We’re still friends though. She told me that it is impossible for someone to truly have no faith; that someone has to have faith in something be it God, themselves, or other people. I disagreed. I think that in some way you will always fail yourself, others will always fail you, and there is no proof of a God to lean on so there is nothing to have faith in. I don’t say there is no God because in all honesty, I don’t know if there is or not. I do know that it doesn’t matter either way because I’m not able to put my faith in the unknown.

The ability to put your faith in something unknown is something I admire and respect. I was telling Lakeiya that I think it would be easier to be able to have faith. Not that I am saying that being truly faithful is an easy task, I’ve seen people try and it obviously is a struggle. However, to be able to believe in something untouchable involves, as she said, a commitment and surrender that requires extreme dedication. I get that. Even so, faith gives you meaning and purpose. If I could live a life where I would get meaning and purpose shown to me I gladly would. It just doesn’t work that way.

There was a time when I thought very seriously about getting into religion. I thought it was something that might help me get direction and answers in life. I examined different religious groups and none of them showed me any real truth although they all had aspects I liked and respected. They all had hints of truth. However, I’m the kind of person who needs the truth to come up and smack me in the face. I like scientific fact. No religion could do that for me. I can’t just accept something as truth unless I really believe it with everything I have. In all honesty, there is nothing worse than someone who says they have religion and yet isn’t completely sure. I wasn’t going to be that person.

Could you imagine waking up every day doubting your beliefs? You would spend the morning thinking about things and eventually convince yourself yet again that your faith was reasonable and correct and be happy until the next morning when you are unsure all over again? That isn’t the kind of life I would want to live. I have to instead be content to believe that all I have to rely on is me and those around me. At the same time I know that we are not infallible and mistakes will be made and people will be hurt.

I have to be comfortable with the idea that things might utterly and completely fall apart and that nothing but me and those I love will be there to help me get back on my feet. I know that if everything falls apart that I will eventually put something back together again that works because I am a rational and intelligent person. I have to be able to examine my sadness and my failures and love and cherish them until they become such a part of me that I can let them go and leave them behind. Nothing will help me do that other than me. If I can’t embrace my pain and suffering I know that it will consume me and ultimately bring about my demise. I am ok with that. It’s all on me. It’s no one else’s responsibility than my own and if I fail it is my fault. In a way, I find that comforting.

Lakeiya mentioned that it would be hard for her to live without the faith that there was some purpose to it all. I find it rather easy. To me, you just enjoy yourself and try to be a good person because your actions will inspire others to enjoy themselves and be good people and that is all we can expect. When I am gone, maybe the little bit of goodness and happiness I put out into the cosmos will do some good for someone else. To me, that is enough. I don’t need some mystical reason for me to be here nor do I see why some mystical being would want me around. I don’t need life to have some grand purpose because the creation of life was all a matter of chance so why would there be a greater purpose to it? I don’t need or expect eternal rewards for being the only way I can be, which is as good as possible but full of mistakes. Then again, I wouldn’t eternal reward down if it was offered. To some people that kind of life without real purpose seems empty and meaningless. To me it seems like something to keep living for.

She Makes Me Wanna Die, Tricky- I think this is such a romantic and wonderful song. It doesn’t hurt that it also sounds incredibly hot.

Suite: Judy Blue Eyes, Crosby Stills Nash and Young- This is one of my favorite songs of all time. It speaks truth, it speaks love, and it speaks pain. It also has a great beat and you can dance to it.

ABC, The Jackson Five- What a nice group of songs for today! This one just makes me smile because there is something so wonderful and hopeful about an adorable child singing about things they obviously don’t know about. We’ll ignore the fact that the adorable child grew up to be insane.

IN WHICH NATALIE GETS PHILOSOPHICAL

The other day I decided to begin rereading The Fountainhead, by Ayn Rand. This has to be one of my all time favorite books. Ayn Rand, as a person, mystifies me. Although I am no expert, her philosophy, Objectivism, is both highly reasonable and completely ludicrous. However, regardless of her ideology, this book is an absolute masterpiece.

While I have a great deal of admiration for Howard Roark, our hero, I find myself wondering how horrible it would be to be the kind of person that he is. I like being a person rules by emotion and instinct. I think it would be a cold, albeit noble, existence to exist solely for self-satisfaction and pursue that with rigorous logic. As someone said to him, while trying to add some columns to his building (funniest movie scene ever by the way), “in practical life, one can’t always be so flawlessly consistent. There is always the incalculable human element of emotion. We can’t fight that with cold logic”. Nor would most of us want to.

The other facet of Objectivism that I really have a hard time grasping is the idea that all in life should contribute to making the self as happy as possible, which is fine, but that in doing so all altruistic actions are seen as detrimental to the pursuit of happiness for the self. Maybe I am one of the few that get personal satisfaction helping others, but I don’t think I am by any means alone in this. I think altruism is something many people hold dear. However, since she also says there is no place for faith in a true Objectivists life, then maybe she would find more people open to this idea. Then again, I’m not big on faith but I sure am big on altruism. The whole Capitalist thing in Objectivism is also something that makes a lot of sense to me but also something that I can’t totally buy into. But it is to a lesser extent than the others so it isn’t as important to mention.

In fact, I think I lack a lot of necessary qualities to be a true Objectivist. Not that I really want to be, but I think it is interesting that I can look at a philosophy and see so much in it that I admire and yet want nothing to do with it. I do, however want to be like Howard Roark. This presents quite a problem for me because he is a character based on the Objectivist ideal. He has incredibly strong convictions and a sense of purity about him and his passions. He cannot compromise on his work because he loves it and it is an integral part of him. He exists to create and build that which is most important to him. He would rather toil endlessly an a job where his talents aren’t used at all then to compromise his integrity and do a job in a way that compromises his true love for his creations. I find this all incredibly beautiful.

I also find it incredibly depressing. I wonder how many people of conviction with a true passion for their work have decided to stop because I wasn’t well received. How often is a true genius overlooked by the establishment and resigned to their insignificant fate, unable to create what they know they can and unable to compromise to create anything less than ideal? Such immense tragedy lies in that thought. Sadly, much art needs to be commissioned. Much writing can’t be written because no one will publish it. How many times do we hear about great works of all genres that were almost never made, published, painted, etc. because of financial problems? Far too many. I hope we can find some of those pieces. I hope we find them in their purest and unadulterated states. I hope that they come to mean something to someone. That is the true purpose of art.

Then again, maybe we should be mourning the pieces that were compromised for the sake of being put in front of the public eye? Should we look at everything we are fed and wonder if it is the creator’s intention that it come cross that way. I guess it leaves us realizing we have to create for ourselves. I think that, in a way, is what blogs, podcasts, youtube videos, etc. have become. It’s a place for us to speak out, uncensored, about what we feel is important. It’s a place where anyone and everyone can create their ideals and share them with the world. I think Ayn Rand would have been proud of bloggers, well some of them at any rate. Which is kind of disturbing to me.

1. What happened to/ The world we knew/ When we were dreaming, scheming/ Whiling the time away.

2. Megan/ She don’t eat bacon/ She never killed a sweet innocent little piggy to get bacon.

3. Fuck the police/ coming straight from the underground/ a young nigga got it bad cause I’m brown/ and not the other color/ so police think/ they have the authority to kill a minority. Fuck THa Police, NWA. Identified by Johnny Yen

4. Something’s wrong cause my mind is fading/ and everywhere I look there’s a dead end waiting/ Temperatures dropping at the rotten oasis/ stealing kisses from the leprous faces. Devil's Haircut, Beck. Identified by Monica

5. Little salamander/ Where did you go/ Edge of the yard/ I found you, you know/ All brown and hard.

CAN WE GET A MOMENT OF SILENCE

Today I actually have something to say. Go figure. While reading the Red Eye this morning, I learned that the Illinois state senate has passed a bill requiring schools K-12 to have a moment of silence at the beginning of every school day. This is seen as a way to circumvent the whole no prayer in the schools thing. Obviously, they can’t require prayer because of a little thing called The Constitution but, apparently, this is just fine.

Currently, there is a law saying that teachers can choose to have a moment of silence at the beginning of the day if they so desire. I had no idea about this, then again I have never attended school in Illinois and I don’t know how long this law has been around. It seems strange to me though. I do, however, know that I will very likely be teaching in Illinois at some point and will, as of now, be required to have a moment of silence in my classroom. I find this disgusting.

I have written about my views on organized religion before (although it was so long ago i had like one reader and no comments). I consider myself to be agnostic andI am generally uncomfortable around praying people. I don’t know why but I guess I assume that your praying should be done in the comfort of your own church or home. Maybe I am being insensitive about it but that is just the way I feel. Once I went to breakfast with co-workers and was about to start eating when one was like, “Wait, we have to pray.” I looked at her a little funny and ate. Thinking "Sorry, I don’t have to do anything". (I totally I wrote that interaction wrong. It was more like our food came and I picked up my fork and she stopped me with "You better pray over that food, you don't know where it has been". "Thanks, gross, and I don't pray" I thought. She then began to pray aloud while I just sat there with my fork still in my hand looking confused. I did wait for her to finish before eating. I'm not as rude as all that. Although I did want to be.) Now, if I am eating with someone and they take time out for a little prayer to themselves I am not bothered. I guess it is organized praying that gets to me. Kind of like how organized religion does but spirituality doesn’t.

Now if people want to pray before they start their school-day it’s fine. Do it before you get to school. If you want to have a little moment to yourself at the start of class then fine, but to have it legislated is preposterous. I fully understand that just because people are being silent doesn’t mean they are praying. A moment of silence is technically a time for reflection and introspection. However, that is not how it will be seen. I would guess that there are other teachers or potential teachers who, like me, are uncomfortable with the idea. That would be why some of them have elected not to have moments of silence in their classrooms. I would also guess that, particularly in High School, there would be a number of students who, like me are a little uncomfortable with the whole idea.

Maybe I am being too sensitive. Maybe there really isn’t anything strange about requiring this and I am just an odd person out. Maybe my thinking that people have a right to go to work and school and not be surrounded by people involved in religious practices is out of line. I really don’t know. I do know, however, that I don’t think it is right. I don’t think it is something we should be required to experience. If you want to pray at school go to a religious school. There are plenty of them. I know those schools cost money and that brings up a whole issue of class and rights of the more economically disadvantaged to be able to pray in school. I do see both sides to the issue. I just think there are many far more important (and less divisive) things that our state senate could be focusing on.

On a happier note it looks like they are also very close to passing a bill on legalizing civil unions. It’s not marriage, but it’s a step in the right direction. Baby steps here, people, baby steps.

I am also getting my hair cut tonight. I have no idea where my camera is so I am hoping that I can find it by the time I get home tonight for an after picture. If not I’ll either be very happy tomorrow or very sad. Maybe my writing will sufficiently describe what happened to my head.

1. It’s raining/ It’s raining/ There’s nothing you can do/ It doesn’t only rain on you/ But you’re acting all upset/ like you’re the only one that’s wet.

2. On the corner/ We talk away/ Everybody's older these days/ I'll just hit the reset button on this game.

3. Let it flow/ Let yourself go/ Slow and low that is the tempo. Kiyotoe knows it's the Beastie Boys but we still have room for the title. Ern to the rescue with our title of "Slow and Low".

4. Well she was just seventeen/ You know what I mean/ And the way she looked was way beyond compare. I Saw Her Standing There, The Beatles. Identified by WLFG and Danielle

5. Lada-dada-da it’s the motherfucking “d” “o” double g/ Lada-dada-da you know I’m hoppin with the “d” “r” “e”. Kiyotoe Knows it's Dr. Dre but we are, again, titleless Ern has cleared it us with "The Next Episode"

LOVE FOR THE UNDERDOG

Yesterday really should have been a snow day. This morning I woke up feeling just horrible and had to call in sick to work. So far I’ve drank Orange Juice for some good old fashioned vitamin C and eaten ice cream for my sore throat. It helped a little but I still am not doing all that well. There have been a few people in the office so sick they missed weeks of work. I missed a few days a while ago due to my asthma. I’m not having that ultra-sick thing happening anymore and I hope that staying home early on to rest will help get me on the mend.

I had a chance to watch Leaves From Satan’s Book, a silent film made in 1919 that I DVRed months ago but never got around to watching. The premise was very interesting and since it is based on a book I may have something to add to my reading list. After being cast down from heaven, Satan is told that he must wander the earth enticing people to commit evil deeds. For every one who submits to his will another hundred years will be added to his penance. For every one who resists him, one thousand years will be taken away from his time on earth. He wanders through time telling people to do evil while secretly hoping that they will do the right thing. What an existence. Unfortunately the DVR didn’t record the whole movie and I missed a little of the last vignette. I really hope that they resisted his temptation and knocked a little off his sentence. I don’t know why but I have always rooted for the anti-hero, particularly one who doesn’t truly want to be evil. There is something so pathetic about them that it stirs something in me. The true heroes are so together that they don’t seem to need your support. It’s the anti-hero who truly needs a friend and to find redemption.

Last night I watched Phantom of the Opera. It is one of those things that I thought I should see. It has become a part of the culture and I didn’t really know the story. I knew the music. People skated to it enough times that I was far too familiar with the primary songs. The words, however, were mostly unknown to me because you aren’t really allowed to skate to things with words. Or rather you weren’t allowed to, the times have changed. As horrible and manipulative as the Phantom was, I really wanted Christine to stay with him and keep him company. Even the woman who saved him as a child and brought him to the opera house wasn’t a true friend. She was still afraid of him. Just because he had a grossly disfigured face doesn’t mean that he didn’t need someone to care for him. I did wonder how that little mask he wore covered up the extent of his disfigurement for most of the movie but I guess that’s just one of those artistic license things. At least they didn’t kill him.

My affection for the anti-hero is somewhat manifested in my work. I want to work whit the people that the majority of our society doesn’t see much hope for. I want to contribute something to their lives that will take them off that path and lead them to be able to walk in the footsteps of a hero. Sometimes I feel I have accomplished that, other times not as much. When I was working with the GED students I really had affection for the ones with severe obstacles, not that any of them didn’t have obstacles, but obviously some needed more help than others. One student in particular was so far gone that I was essentially instructed to abandon him and he was kicked off the premises permanently. I still talk to him occasionally. He is doing really well. He attributes some of that to what happened to him in the few months he attended our school. It’s one of those things where when you look at someone head-on you don’t think you have the resources to help but when you get a chance to know them and understand what happened to put them into a bad situation you can do something to change course and see where they go. I guess that’s why I love the anti-hero. With a hero there is no chance for redemption and there is nothing you can really do to affect them. An anti-hero needs you. Without them, there would be no need for heroes at all. What kind of a world would that be?

Omega Supreme DM Remix, Dangermouse and Jemini- This is easily one of my favorite songs. Actually the entire 26inch EP is fantastic. As a pair these guys have beats and rhymes that you can’t criticize. I don’t think I have ever heard anything Dangermouse has done that I don’t like though. I feel cool listening to it. Obviously, this means that I am not cool at all.

Call My Name, Prince- The iPod is working magic today. Best slow jam EVER. I tend not to be a huge fan of the slow jam because it is so silly. This song, however, puts it down. Prince is obviously the coolest, unlike myself.

Don’t Let Me Be, The Animals- Hell yeah, I am very proud of my shuffle today. Sometimes I am a little ashamed of what comes on but today is certainly not one of those days. I need to figure out how to attach these song files to my posts so everyone else can enjoy the wondrous goodness (an occasional wondrous badness) of my music. This song also fits fairly well into the whole anti-hero theme. Nice way to wrap things up.

IT DOESN'T GET MUCH LAMER THAN THIS

Last night I was talking to Ryan and he told me about an article that was recently released saying that Hillary Clinton’s camp had done a background check on Barack Obama and found that he attended a radical Muslim grade school for two years. Attending this school seemed to hint that he had toes to radical Muslim communities and interests and therefore couldn’t be trusted. Then, a CNN correspondent went to check out the school and found that it was not at all radical and seemed just like a regular old school. My initial reaction was shock and horror. I never claimed to be a huge Clinton supporter but I found it insane that she would allow someone from her camp to broadcast such mess against a fellow democrat. I vowed to do more research on the subject. From what I read today, it seems that the story was printed in Insight Magazine, not the most liberal of publications and Fox News also really ran with the story. From what I have seen, Clinton’s camp hasn’t said that they conducted such an investigation and Obama’s seems relatively silent on the issue.

Now, I am not claiming to have all the facts straight by any means. I don’t know if this is some dirty politicking on the democratic side or an elaborate scheme from the republicans to turn the democrats against each other. I don’t know if it matters. The fact that anyone would put the idea in people’s heads that Barack Obama attended a militaristic Islamic school, no matter how young he was, is so incredibly dirty and evil that I don’t know what to say. In my last post I talked about how people have been “mispronouncing” his name or focusing a lot on his middle name, Hussein. Although that is important, this goes to an entire different level. Websites all over are talking about this issue and I have put a few links at the end of the post. The most common concerns people seemed to have after hearing about his radical past (that doesn’t exist) was that his allegiance wouldn’t be to the United States but rather to the Muslim countries. Are you kidding people? Then there is talk about the fact that since his father was a Muslim then he is a Muslim (I guess it works like Judaism through the maternal line) and since he says he is a Christian and attends church that he has broken Islamic law and is an open target for assassination. Like the first viable Black candidate for the presidency in the US needed another reason for talk about being assassinated.

I would assume the people who are freaking out about this story aren’t the people who would vote for him anyway but maybe it has raised concerns about some people who were on the fence. It doesn’t take much considering the political climate of the country to get people thinking the wrong thoughts. It is also very interesting that in the many things I looked up online there was little or minor reference to the fact that his school was not very focused on religion (but did respect it) or that he wasn’t too big on religion as a child in the first place. I guess those things don’t make for interesting stories.

The Insight Article
A Sane Person
A Crazy Person

I can’t find my favorite thread anymore but it was full of a bunch of crazies saying the strangest things I had ever heard. Obama being the antichrist was mentioned a lot. I am very sad I can't share it but none of the searches I did earlier seem to be turning it up. Maybe they banned me from the site knowing I was only going to link to them to laugh. Maybe they erased the post from existence because it was so insane. Who knows?

Only one song left from yesterday. Good job guys, those weren’t the easiest.

1. Now who got the chance to make things right/ Why the politicians always want to fight?

2. Not a lotta bling/ when you do the thing/ bada boom bada bing

3. Now I taught the weeping willow how to cry/ And I showed the cloud how to cover/ Up a clear blue sky

4. It’s gonna be sudden/ It’s gonna be strange/ Gonna stop on a dime. Give you five cents change.

5. I’m one/ big queen/ No one/ can stop me

CHILDREN'S TV PART 2

Since I am talking about kid’s shows I wanted to mention one that I came across recently. It is called “Bibleman” and, as one can guess, it is about a superhero that fights evil with wisdom from the Bible. Although I am not a religious person, I have no problem with people who are religious (or who aren’t for that matter) wanting their children to see TV that will not corrupt them in any way. However, I think there are many fine children’s programs out there (see previous post) that will not do this. I would not have a problem with a fine program that taught the lessons of the Bible whatsoever. I think that would be a fine use of TV. However, Bibleman was one of the worst shows I have ever seen. Just because it is about God, people, doesn’t mean you should have your kids watching it.

First of all, Bibleman’s sidekick is this military type guy. I say that because he has a navy seals type hat on. What does that have to do with the Bible? Oh yeah, our military is all about taking out the evildoers. I guess it does make sense. Secondly, they have this supercomputer at their base that tells them what to do. Pardon me if I am wrong, but wouldn’t God be a viable point of information for a hero such as Bibleman? Thirdly, he fought a guy called Misery who was trying to take Bibleman’s computer and reprogram it to do something bad (I turned it on mid-program and was too busy being appalled to notice much about the plot) and they both had light sabers. I am not kidding. Where do I begin with the problems with this one? Misery is a Stephen King book, not a good name for a super-villain. Light sabers are from Star Wars, they do not belong on a fourth-rate production values having Superhero show called Bibleman. Fourthly, when the computer joined the fight, it turned into one of those training robot type things from David Lynch’s Dune but with the powers of the Emperor. It was literally a little ball that flew around and shot lightning bolts at Misery.

What does all this sci-fi fighting have to do with the Bible you wonder? Nothing I say. However, before the light saber fight, Bibleman was at a science fair quoting scripture to some boy (let’s call him Timmy) who wasn’t happy with his experiment because everyone else had a better one. “Now Timmy,” said Bibleman “Did you try as hard as you could?” “Yes Bibleman,” said Timmy. “Then you are a winner [quotation from scripture that I don’t remember and would feel terrible about misquoting] Oh no Timmy, Misery is attacking. I must go stop him.” Plus, does this mean that Bibleman is advocating mediocre schoolwork being ok?

Again, no disrespect, but there are probably some kids out there who are only allowed to watch this show that looks like the Power Rangers bastard child. If you are going to have a show like this for kids, please make it quality. Just because it is righteous doesn’t mean it is good TV. I enjoyed some Seventh Heaven every once in a while. Aaron Spelling couldn’t really go wrong in my opinion but that was a good show. I fell asleep after Bibleman and woke up to a fine cartoon about the miracles of Jesus. I wasn’t mad about it. It featured an adorable child singing a very catchy tune (that I have since forgot but was in my head for a good thirty minutes) about how sad he was that his two fish and five loaves of bread wouldn’t feed everyone. We all know what happened next. It even had some comedy like when Jesus asked (I think it was Peter) to come out on the water with him and then he started to doubt and fell in with a splash. OK, not total comedy but it looked pretty funny on the cartoon. What I am trying to say is I enjoyed this cartoon, even though it told stories we all know well regardless of how often we do or do not attend religious services. Bibleman was just a disgrace. A sick attempt to force bad TV down the throats of people who want some good programming options for their children. I find that reprehensible. Plus it was violent. I suppose though that it is following in the belief that violence is ok if it furthers your religious agenda. I find that belief also to be reprehensible. It is the cause of the majority of wars throughout history. Present war included.

To sum up, if you are in need of a laugh, here is some Bibleman for you to enjoy.

And keeping in the religious theme, I am sorry to everyone I may have hurt or offended this year. My bad. (for those of you who don't know, it is Yom Kippur. We Jews apologize today. If any of you have said anything bad about my boyfriend Stephen Colbert call him at 1-888-oopsjew or is it 1-800? Eh, try both.)

It is time again for “The Shuffle Game” let’s see what we’ll be boppin' our heads to today.
Lucky Ball and Chain, They Might be Giants- Ah, They must be GREAT. I sometimes feel like I could be someone’s lucky ball and chain as I am also 5ft tall. Then again, I better not get lost or someone is getting his ass kicked.

Happiness Runs, Donovan- This is by no means my favorite Donovan song but any Donovan is pretty good. Except that on song I always skip, that song sucks ass. Tony tried to tell me that Sunshine Superman couldn’t be my theme song anymore because a woodland creature such as myself would have some lame fairy music as a theme song. We settled the problem by saying that when I throw a crazy woodland bash Donovan is ideal tunes, if I am just bouncing around the trees then I must stick with lame fairy music such as plays in Dark Cloud (best video game ever (except super turbo puzzle fighter II)). Oh I am also thinking of getting Lego Star Wars any opinions on that?

Live From Planet X, MF Doom- This sing is actually an entire album. It is a good album. It is also perfect that we end this post with a guy who wears a mask. Word.

IT WAS A DAY FOR LEARNING

What started out as me watching a show just because the title was really fun to say turned into a hour of realization and amazement. On what I think was the discovery channel there was a show called Humanzee about a chimp named Oliver who was strangely human. I put it on the DVR because I had to watch Who Wants To Be A Superhero (good-bye Major Victory, I miss you already here's to hopes of a Fat Mama victory because Feedback scares me) and as soon as it was over I turned to Tony and said HUMANZEE HUMANZEE. Maybe people other than me have heard of this Oliver. Apparently he is like 47 years old and was a big star back in the day. This guy looks like a chimp, kinda, but walks upright. Big deal you say, all the monkeys can walk. While that is true, they can't walk for long without going knuckles down. Oliver just strolls around and shakes people warmly by the hand I tried to add a picture but it didn't work cause I am a lame but there is a nice article about Oliver on Wikipedia and you can see more. Wow I made a link, I hope it works. It was thought that maybe Oliver was a human-chimp hybrid but after decades of debate it was discovered that he is a chimp but has an odd DNA sequencing pattern. Maybe he is like some kind of evolutionary intermediary creature. Anyway, he was nice.

However, Oliver was not the only thing of interest in the Humanzee show. Possibly more interesting was the Liger. I assume everyone has seen Napoleon Dynamite and knows that the Liger is "only like his favorite animal". I did not know that a Liger was real. Apparently they are not only real but they are HUGE! The growth regulating gene is on the male lion and the female tiger (or vice versa) and they breed them the way that there ends up being no growth regulating gene. The liger eats like 2-3 times as much meat as either the lion or the tiger does. The liger was cute and fat. Who knew?

Of course I have to mention that Pluto is certainly no longer a planet. I knew it was smarter to make it a non-planet than to admit all those other non-planets to planet status.

Finally, while watching the Today show this morning before work (I know its lame but sometimes fascinating things happen) I learned that Jesus is back. This evangelical guy from Puerto Rico is running around saying that he is the second coming. He is also saying that sin is not real, the devil doesn't exist, and prayer doesn't help anything. The guy doesn't sound all that bad. Apparently people give him a lot of money but he certainly doesn't require it so, whatever.

Maybe our musical choices today will have divine inspiration.

Sour Times, Portishead- While back in the 90s I think many people I knew considered Portishead as a group to have reached the status of a minor deity I may not go that far. I am always happy to hear their wonderful music. I just kind of wish it hadn't been this song. It's really good and all but I am kind of over it. I mean it has been a long time.

A Collection Of Poems About Water, Of Montreal- I think that "The Gay Parade" is essentially my favorite album right now. It makes me incredibly happy. I can't even let a tiny sour look come on my face when this is on. I love all songs on the album, a very rare occurrence. It just flows so perfectly. It reminds me of bedtime stories I would tell people about magic and wonder and goofiness.

Rush Hour, Ani Difranco- This song kills me. It is so incredibly beautiful and sad. I think of all those I mentioned today this has the touch of the divine. Not that I am saying it's a religious song, because it isn't, but it just speaks to humanity and primal emotion. Awesome.

WHEN ON A ROLL

Well I figured I covered one of the most controversial topics out there yesterday so why not tackle another one today. I don't think this one is as potentially offensive though. The topic today will be religion.

I am fascinated with religion almost as much as I am fascinated by racism. However, I am by no means as educated about religion. I actually find it somewhat scary. Don't get me wrong I love to gather around the Christmas tree and the seder plate when the time comes but I can count the times I have been to a religious edifice for something other than a wedding, funeral, bar or bat mitzvah, or tour on one hand. I think I only need one finger but I am probably leaving something out. Needles to say, it is obvious that I don't much go for organized religion.

The one class I took that dealt with the subject "The Birth of Europe" was utterly fascinating. Although it was not the first time I had read the Bible (for pure scholarship mind you), it was he first time I got to discuss it in a proper forum. I secretly want to go to Bible study because I find it fascinating but all the hard-core-religious people around me would give me the heebie-jeebies. I don't knock anyone's beliefs. Actually I think my life might be better if I had more faith. It seems really comforting to have something like that to turn to. I just can't roll like that. I ask far too many questions and doubt entirely too much of what people have to say.

In a way, I feel that religion is the cause of an abnormal amount of the world's suffering (as well as its joys) and getting mixed up in something like that says trouble to me. One of the things that I really remember from my class is the story of Abraham. If you really look at it, he is the source of 3 of the world's major religions, Christianity, Judaism, and Islam. Now, my scholarship on this subject was rather superficial compared to that of much of my study but, if I remember correctly, the Islamic faith has Abraham taking Ishmael up the mountain to be sacrificed rather than Isaac, thus making him the divinely chosen son and therefore making Islam the "chosen" religion. There are some texts that included a third party in the story, a servant whose name I can't remember but apparently appears later on in the New Testament and is seen as predicting the rise of Christianity (or something like that). However, since those three religions share so much of the basic back-story, why is all the hatred and fighting necessary between those groups today.

Although I am technically Jewish, as it follows the maternal line, I obviously am not immersed in the culture. Yet, when I talk to members of my family who are more traditionally Jewish and ask them what the tenet of the faith is they basically tell me that you are simply supposed to be good to people. I can't really front on that one. Plus they throw a great party. I try and live my life by being good to people. I can't say that I always succeed. I have been a downright horrible person at times. But I do try.

Maybe that is my problem with religions that focus on good people going one place and bad people going another. I mean that is so subjective. Then again, who better than God to be subjective about such things. I just don't think it can be that simple. If there is some final judgment won't they look on what is in your heart rather than all the mistakes you have made over the course of life. Life is hard and there are no training wheels. Isn't that the right thing to do?

Over the years, people have asked me if I am an atheist. At times, I wrongly though that I was. It's not that I don't believe I simply don't know what to believe in. I have a very hard time with a being sitting up there watching everything. It just doesn't seem logical to me. I feel it has to be something more internal. What makes sense to me is some kind of vital life force that connects everyone and everything and influences our sense of morality and judgment. I guess if you have to put a label on it I would fall into the Agnostic category.

Is it hypocritical to feel this way and still enjoy religious holidays? I don't think so. I think that whatever this life force is wants us to gather and to love and to enjoy each other. I think that is truly the divine plan.

The divine always appears in music. Let's listen to some.

Yo Mamma, Pharcyde- Uh, not divine. Maybe this belonged on yesterday's post. This reminds me of an episode of Benson when Clayton and Benson learned they were related and had a battle of the dozens to decide who would inherit the family fortune. Benson whuped Clayton's ass all over the kitchen.

Punky Brewster Theme Song- What a sweet show. I wanted to be just like Punky. The only thing I think we have in common is big boobs, and she got rid of hers.

Come On Home, Franz Ferdinand- I remember watching Degrassi on the N and seeing the video for Take Me Out and telling Monica how great it was with stomping feet all over the place. She had no idea what I was talking about until she saw it and then she got it. We loved us some Take Me Out. Unfortunately for Franz Ferdinand, the whole album kind of sounds like Take Me Out but not as good. I don't hate it, it has a good beat and you can dance to it.

LET'S TALK ABOUT STUPIDS

My biggest pet peeve in life is stupid people. This is rather unfortunate because stupid people are all around us. We encounter them on a daily basis, wherever we turn, and there is absolutely nothing that someone can do to avoid stupids entirely. They are on the train, the street, eateries, and of course teeming throughout the media. Most of the time, I try to ignore their loud comments, their nails on the chalkboard ways, but sometimes I just can't do it. Today I would like to talk about a particular kind of stupid, the Racist stupid, and to be even more specific, the Anti-Semite, and to really get down to it Mel Gibson. Maybe I am biased because I happen to be of the Jewish persuasion (sorta) but come on that shit was too funny. To begin with the guy didn't have much of a chance. Since his father reportedly believes much of the Holocaust was untrue we may have to cut him a tiny bit of slack. I mean we all know racism begins in the home. However, plenty of people who have those one or two back-woods relatives, even a few with back-woods parents come out just fine. So maybe that isn't as much of an excuse as I had thought.

Lets start with that Passion movie. Now I really can't say all that much about it because I certainly didn't see that piece of shit. I mean who really wanted to sit through a film in a dead language about a guy getting his ass beat in primitive ways. Don't get me wrong; I enjoy a good violent film very much. If it had been ninjas kicking the shit out of Jesus I may have watched, no I would have been first in line because that seems really funny to me. Not that I mean any disrespect to the Christians they are my people too (sorta) But the lash??? I mean where is the action and excitement? At least JC Superstar had dancing singing and a banging soundtrack. So the point I am trying to make is people seemed to say he blamed the Jews for killing Jesus in that movie. Again, I didn't see the film but from what I know and what I have heard they didn’t come out looking so good. So let's look at history. Those Pharisees and Sadducees were afraid of the Romans and they basically set him up to get arrested. Now maybe they should have knows because of how Roman justice worked that it was a death sentence but maybe not. I think they just wanted the guy out of their hair. Then Herod really screwed things up for Jesus but he wasn't even Jewish. Sure his dad worshiped the Jewish god but he had an Arabian mother and any good Jew knows that it is passed thorough the maternal line plus it is commonly understood he was a roman puppet. So my point is that anyone with any lick of sense knows the Romans and not the Jews killed Jesus.

Ok Now to deal with the wonderful statement that the Jews are the causes of all the worlds’ wars. Now I don't really feel like doing a complete run through of every war since the beginning of recorded time because this would be a long boring post (as if it isn’t already) that would necessitate a lot of research into crap that I just don't care about so I won't go there. Lets just talk about wars (and maybe a few conflicts) of the 20th century. Oh this is all stuff I am remembering and as you can see no research was done so maybe I'm wrong on some facts and stuff but oh well its fun. WWI- Archduke Ferdinand, Jew? Killed by a Jew? I think not. WWII- Crazy old Hitler- Jewish? There has been some speculation since one of his ancestors although I can't remember who was illegitimate and that person's mother worked in a Jewish household (everyone likes sleeping with the help) but it seems rather unlikely and is certainly not fact. We do know he hated the Jews and while hatred of them was certainly a HUGE aspect of WWII I do not believe it could be cited as the actual cause of the war. Now lets talk about some conflicts Vietnam, Korea probably not having much to do with the Jews. Now lets get to the Middle East. Israel was "created" in 1948 as a result of WWII now I can see that putting a bunch of people in a country already inhabited by other people will cause much conflict. This conflict has been played out in various events for the last uh 50 years give or take. However, not entirely the fault of the Jews. Instead blame all the countries who wanted to give these displaced people their own state rather than take them in and we all know how little of a problem the US has with displacing the people that live somewhere.... So, Mel, if you're reading, it's not the Jews fault. Idiot. I mean sure, they should have worked with their displaced neighbors when they got plopped somewhere and started making laws but so should have the USA.

So now let's talk a little about his HILARIOUS apology statement. "When I say something, either articulated and thought out, or blurted out in a moment of insanity" ok let's stop there. So the man has admitted he is nutso. That’s a good first step. Let's look further "Every human being is God's child [even those stinkin' Jews] and if I wish to honor my God I have to honor his children [as much as I may hate to do so] but please know from my heart that I am not an anti-Semite [I just play one in the movies]. I am not a bigot [I just hate the Jews, doesn’t everyone?]. Hatred of any kind goes against my faith [so even though I said all those things I couldn't have possibly meant it because I like God]. I'm not just asking for forgiveness [please, please forgive me, Jesus would]. I would like to take it one step further and meet with leaders in the Jewish community, with whom I can have a one on one discussion to discern the appropriate path for healing.... It’s about existing in harmony in a world that seems to have gone mad [because of those war causing Jews]". Oh Mel, I really like how you asked to meet with Jewish leaders, and how you said it isn't about films or getting your career out of the toilet. You really don't have to worry or go meet with those Jews to try and make it better. All those people, like our president, who are working hard for Armageddon, will still come and see your films. There were enough of them to get Dubya elected twice (sorta), I am sure those same folks can save your sad and sorry career.

Ok that was a really fun ranting tirade about something that I think is totally funny and not at all important. I now return to my favorite segment of our show, 3 random songs.

Ecstasy, PJ Harvey- I love a 4 track demo. Gritty, raw, full of anger and angst. It brings you back to the basest of human emotions and essential feelings of soul-searching passion.

Shout, Tears For Fears- 80's gold if I ever heard it. Such a fine pairing of explosions of feeling I have never seen. These sure are the things I can do without "in violent times you shouldn't have to sell your soul" preach on!!!!!

What Do You Want Me To Do?, Prince- Although Musicology is not my favorite of all Prince albums I have to admit it has grown on me an enormous amount. It is a good old-fashioned smooth sounding album and you can't help but groove.