TV Night

A brief break from Vacation stories to talk a little about last nights TV programs. It was a hard and long night. It started with Leanne winning Project Runway. It wasn’t a surprise. We knew months ago when we looked at the collections online that she was going to win. It was a good collection. Jerrell, my favorite, was already gone so I didn’t have too much invested in the episode. As long as Kenley lost, and she did, all was right in the world. Man was her collection ugly and stolen. I am quite sad to see Project runway go. I know it won’t be returning to Bravo *cry* and Monica said there are complications with the move to Lifetime so the current season may never be shown at all. What a sad world this world will be without Project Runway. However, Top Chef is starting up again soon so, yeah.

Then there was the debate. I am so glad that it was the last one because I think any more and my head may have actually exploded. I couldn’t believe that three of the six Joe Sixpacks they interviewed after the debate on NBC were planning to vote for McCain after that mess. One said Obama. Two said nothing. Were they watching the same debate that I was? I read an article this morning that said McCain was attacking (true) and winning because of it (really?) and was making Obama uncomfortable (huh?). The biggest moment of discomfort I saw was the stunned look on McCain’s face when Obama explained the lack of penalties good old Joe the Plumber would pay under his healthcare plan. He looked like someone had asked him what the Bush Doctrine was.

Anyway, from what I saw it was an easy win for Obama. He kept cool, stuck to (and expanded on) his talking points, and made a whole lot of rational sense. McCain got angry, didn’t back up his claims, and both looked and sounded like a crazy person. If he manages to pull this one out all I’ll be able to do is speak like Maya Angelou (aka David Alan Grier) and say, “President elect John McCain…ain’t that a bitch,” which leads me to the point that Chocolate News was a lot funnier than I expected it to be. And that’s all I have to say about that.

RANDOM UNCONNECTED THOUGHTS

Yesterday was a very strange day. I actually forgot that Top Model and Project Runway were on. Luckily I turned on the TV at 9:03 so I didn’t miss much Project Runway but Top Model is a mystery. No worries. That show blows anyway. I must say I am a little bummed that Rami “made it” to Bryant Park. Really, are there avid watchers of the show that don’t know that the top five actually showed at Fashion Week? Did I think Rami’s collection was better than Chris’s? Sure, because it was but that doesn’t mean I wanted him to win. Since Christian “overwhelmingly won the fan favorite,” I think Jillian is a shoe in for winning the show. They won’t let Christian win everything and Jillian’s collection is awesome. Still, the show has surprised me before and anything could happen next week.

I think this Huey Lewis thing is actually working. I keep seeing him pop up everywhere. It could be because I’m looking but I don’t think so. I think that something is actually happening with it. This morning there was a casual mention of Huey in the Red Eye. As half of the world has seen, Huey was featured in Kimmel’s “I’m Fucking Ben Affleck” video. This can’t be all about coincidences. It’s like that thing The Secret that some people believe in. Maybe it’s real.

I have had urges to sing more Talking Heads at karaoke. Since I failed so miserably last time I attempted one of their songs I have no idea where this urge came from. Regardless, I was listening to Stop Making Sense and couldn’t help but picture myself taking on “Once In A Lifetime” with the chorus sung by my little sister while we were both doing David Byrne moves from the video. Man would it ever be a disaster. Same as it ever was.

1. So messed up I want you here/ In my room I want you here/ Now we’re gonna be face to face/ And I’ll lay right down in my favorite place. I Wanna To Be Your Dog, Iggy Pop. Identified by Chatty Knitter

2. I’m coming up man-sized/ Skinned alive/ I want to fit/ I’ve got to get/ Man-sized

3. Close my eyes/ feel me now/ I don’t know how you could not love me now

4. Now Peter Piper picked peppers/ But Run rapped rhymes/ Humpty Dumpty fell down/ That’s his hard time. Peter Piper, Run DMC, Identified by Monica

5. Come down off your throne/ And leave your body lone/ Somebody must change/ You are the reason I’ve been waiting oh so long/ Somebody holds the key. Can't Find My Way Home, Blind Faith. Identified by Dad

THAT WENT SOMEWHERE I WASN'T PLANNING ON

Today is an important day in my office. The first things of mine are going up on the wall. Ah yes, IKEA frames painted in fun colors and arranged in various ways. It resembles a small slice of wall from Addison Apartment Dining Room. We couldn’t paint but we sure could hang a HUGE number of frames and pictures all over the walls. There were frames of all sizes and shapes as well as mirrors, masks, and paintings of various types. It was a room of crazy. I loved it.

Sometimes I think the beauty of design is in its randomness. Sure our cheap IKEA frames didn’t stay straight on the wall. Sure the designs we painted on them were sometimes questionable. It didn’t matter though. The beauty of the room was in the fact that it was a disorganized mess of color and love. When Tony and I resigned our lease this year I was a little sad. Sure, some of that was compounded by the fact that a crazy person lives upstairs but most of it was because it would be another year before I could decorate someplace new.

I think our next apartment will be the last place we live before buying something so it needs to be a place we can stay for a while to save and plan for that next big thing. It needs to be a place with character, it should be a place that I can paint, and it absolutely must be a place where we can have a dog. I don’t think that is too much to ask. We’ll have to see what we can find.

Something about newness is really exciting to me. I feel like this year will be a preparation for many things that are to come. It will be a year of summoning strength and resources to start on something bigger, something important. I don’t know why but movement has really been on my mind lately. Maybe it’s because this will be the last year of my 20s. Come birthday ’09 I’ll be the big 30. I freaked about turning 20 but I am much calmer about 30. I actually just realized that we will be moving a month before my 30^th birthday. I’ll start the new decade in a new place and that sounds like a good plan.

It better have a dishwasher.

Oh, and how did Ricky manage to win a challenge on Project Runway? I mean his piece was kind of cute but I liked Sweet Pea and Christian's outfits better. Also, why was everyone amazed at the originality of Romi using zippers as trim when Jeffrey did that in his winning collection last season? Don't they remember? Just goes to show that the show is slipping. Not that I will stop watching it or anything.

1. When the Witch Doctor Life/ throws his silent bones/ some are crowned kings/ while others lose their thrones

2. It was a clear black night/ a clear white moon/ Warren g was on the streets trying to consume

3. Riding round town with all the windows down/ Eight track playing all your favorite sounds

4. Goodnight/ Goodnight/ Sweet baby/ The world has more for you/ Than it seems

5. Where did you come from lady/ And ooh won’t you take me there/ right away/ Won’t you baby. PYT, Michael Jackson. Identified by Terry

I FINALLY HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY ABOUT PROJECT RUNWAY

All I have to say is about freaking time! This season of Project Runway has been excruciatingly boring in comparison to all other seasons. Although there have been some interesting challenges, many of the designs were just blah and I wasn’t too fond of any of the designers. It started to get a little interesting last week but I really had to question the intelligence behind telling high school girls they looked horrible in what was supposed to be their prom dresses, particularly if they love the dresses. It was just mean. Now even if they like the dress they can’t wear it because everyone will know that fashion experts think it is horrible. Or, maybe they already had prom and no one will care.

Either way, this week was plenty of fun. Design and drama abounded. I haven’t much cared which outfits have won in the past but I was about to tear someone apart if Chris and Christian didn’t take this one home. As much as the judges love Victorya I think she needs a good slapping and I find most of her clothing to be cute enough but nothing special. Jillian’s jacket made that outfit, not the nasty jodhpurs or anything else Victorya did. I mean does Michael Kors really think all women will want to wear those things? I don’t think I know too many who would. Then her snarky comment, “we made three outfits so we should win,” was just too much. Sadly, she may very well end up at Bryant Park with her boring self.

I was also sad to see Kit go. I know they always kick off the team leader but Ricky needs to go home, what is he still doing there? They say everything he makes looks cheap. I think this time they should have made an exception and sent him packing. He seems like a nice guy and all but COME ON.

Chris and Christian put it together. That avant-garde piece was so incredibly fantastic it made me giddy. They handled the surprise second outfit with class and I think it truly embodied the feel of the original piece. They also worked so incredibly well together. Jillian and Victorya were just a couple of last minute ladies and planning is very important. Anyway, take a look at the top looks and judge for yourself. The second place ladies made the black things and the winning guys the tan.

And another thing, Robin Hood Prince of Thieves is AWESOME! Tony and I watched it the other day and were thoroughly entertained. There was so much hilarity that had been forgotten.

1. When the Witch Doctor Life/ throws his silent bones/ some are crowned kings/ while others lose their thrones

2. On a rooftop in Brooklyn/ One in the morning. Watching the lights flash/ In Manhattan. You Said Something, PJ Harvey. Identified by Jason.

3. My old man he’s a singer in the park/ He’s a walker in the rain/ He’s a dancer in the dark.

4. I did you wrong/ My heart went out to play/ And in the game I lost you/ what a price to pay. Oooh, Baby Baby. Smokey Robinson. Identified by Mom.

5. Well I’d rather see you dead little girl/ Than to be with another man. Run For Your Life, The Beatles, Identified by Mom.

RANDOM POST ABOUT STUFF

In case no one knew it is really incredibly cold here in Chicago today. When I woke up the TV said it was 1 outside. That just shouldn’t happen. Unfortunately, I wore my one pair of pants that are not jeans to work yesterday. I also wore my new boots (and could walk in them unlike the other time I tried to wear them in the slush and gave up two feet from my door) and broke them in significantly but not enough for two days in a row. Therefore, I was all about tights and sneakers this morning. I’ve worn tights and sneakers all winter for the last many years, it isn’t a big deal and I knew I would be fine. However, something was different this morning. By the time I got to the train station the place between my knees and my sneakers just didn’t feel right. They came back to normal but it was a little dodgy there for a second.

Not to worry though, I have a solution…legwarmers. Now I wouldn’t typically be a legwarmer wearing in public type of person but it’s freaking cold. I also wouldn’t typically own legwarmers but apparently Tony’s mother figured that since I asked for a bunch of tights for Christmas that they would be a good idea. I laughed a lot when I saw them but have been sporting them around the house under my target pants for extra warmth for some time. Apparently they will make an outside debut.

So last night I watched Conan because I was curious to see what a show without writers would be like. It was pretty bad. However, I really like Conan’s new beard that he grew for solidarity with the writers. I do not like Letterman’s new beard, he looks like a creepy Santa. I realize that many people do not agree with my like of the beard but I think it makes him look less like that little girl from Mary Poppins and more like a regular dude. Plus when he was walking around his office playing the guitar is was way cooler than it would have been if he had not had a flaming red beard.

In additional TV news I still heart Project Runway and really want Christian to die. As I am discussing the show with Monica, however, I realize that everyone is kind of boring. They kept telling me that this season is full of the strongest talent but I don’t believe them. I heart last season. I extra heart season two but just because of Santino. Couldn’t they have brought Santino back instead of Chris? I also am embarrassed to say I watched the Supermodel show that came on I am also ashamed to say that I could possibly become a voter. Crap.

1. Every second/ of every minute of the day/ I let my fancy play

2. OOOHH Baby/ Cry Baby/ Cry Baby/ Welcome back home

3. Get down get down little Henry Lee/ And stay all night with me/ You won’t find a girl/ In this damn world/ That will compare with me. Henry Lee, Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds w/ PJ Harvey. Identified by Jason.

4. I can’t get no/ Satisfaction/ I can’t get no/ Satisfaction. Satisfaction, The Rolling Stones (althouhg I wish it had been Devo) Identified by Jason.

5. Stand/ Under/ Fountain/ Cool skin/ Wash clean. Wash him/ From me

IT'S ALL OVER

Jeffrey is the well-deserved winner of Project Runway. I am a happy camper. In my post More Project Runway To Talk About I said that Uli would take it with Jeffrey coming in second (that post also has links to the collections so you can see them again if you are curious). Just so you guys know, I switched the two of them around in the post like a million times. I would have been happy with either one getting the win. I have to say with all the hell Jeffrey went though with the accusations and all I am really glad he won. Not to mention his collection was just awesome. I still haven’t totally decided if it is fair that someone with his own line gets to win money to start his own line but they let him on in the first place so oh well. I am also very glad Uli came in what appeared to be a very close second. She put out an awesome showing.

Uli’s collection was flowing and beautiful. The colors were great (although they didn’t flow into one another as well as in Jeffrey’s collection) and the audience loved it. I wasn’t too much of a fan of her music though. Jeffrey’s collection was just amazing, I wasn’t all that into his music either, it worked but I think something with a little more bass would have worked better. His blue long dress was an awful mess. If Uli had designed it, it would have been wonderful. The judges didn’t like his other blue dress that looked straight off the body of Lucy (peanut’s Lucy) but I liked it. He did a fantastic job of segueing from one color palate to another in the order of his pieces. It was just a much more professional show than the others. Of course, as I have often said, he is a professional.

Now, let’s talk the losers. Michael was out first and everyone was sad about it. There was just no denying that his collection wasn’t right. He will still make it in the fashion world, he is a very talented designer, he just has to grow up a little. It was a little hard to watch him receive the not so flattering comments. You could just tell that he knew he wasn’t going to win, a hard place for a guy who is used to being on top. He did win the Fan Favorite though and that was nice. I was momentarily scared with Laura’s collection, not because of the clothes, but because of the music. She did an excellent job picking the music for her show. It almost made me like the feathers. Granted she had a few pieces that were pretty nice. Still, I thought that perfectly chosen music might have stolen the show. As a former figure skater, I truly appreciate the pairing with music and costuming. No one came close to Laura in that category. I was very relieved to see her go. She does have a career in fashion though, they all do. I just won’t be buying her icky clothes.

I wonder what all those Jeffrey haters out there will be saying. I hope they don’t try to deny how wonderful his collection was. I can see them saying Uli should have won. It was a close race and could have gone either way.

I wonder whose collections my songs will go with, let’s see.

End of the Century, Blur- I would have to give this to Jeffrey’s collection. Not that it is a particularly good match, although it could work if properly edited, but it would not work at all with the others. Blur is awesome by the way. In case anyone doesn’t or hasn’t listened to them at one point stop what you are doing and download some of their music. NOW.

April in Paris, Thelonious Monk. Obviously this would be Laura’s Collection. However, the music she picked was better. I really loved that music.

Alive, Daft Punk- This would have to go with Street Safari Michael. It would actually work very well. His music was very unmemorable to me. I think this would have been better. Best match by far.

I'M GONNA TELL

Ok, I am one of the few people out there who truly loves Jeffrey on Project Runway. I have loved him from the start. Feel free to throw tomatoes at me. What happened to him last night was just disgusting. For those of you who don’t watch, Jeffrey is an asshole and can be a fantastic designer. There seem to be people out there, my friends included, who like Laura. For those of you who don’t watch, Laura is a heinous wench and a boring designer, always. Jeffrey also happens to already own his own line of clothing called Cosa Nostra (so maybe it isn’t fair that he is on this show) while the other designers don’t and aren’t really as experienced in the fashion world. So Jeffery shows up with his entire collection for fashion week done while the other designers are still working. He is the first person in the history of the show to be totally done at this point. He is also, as far as I know, the first person in the history of the show to have such an established clothing line.

Everyone is working along and Jeffrey leaves the room while Laura announces to everyone else that she thinks Jeffery must not have sewn his garments because he was also busy with Cosa Nostra and since no one else was done it was just impossible. Oh, also his clothes were made too perfectly in her opinion and the craftsmanship didn’t match with the things he had done in the rest of the challenges. Can I just say that I hope everyone in the show took their craftsmanship up a notch when they had 2 months to work on 12 or so pieces rather than 1-2 days per piece in the episodes of the show. If everyone else’s garments didn’t take a huge step up in craftsmanship maybe they have something to think about. Does anyone remember that Jeffrey won the couture challenge in which he did an 80% hand-sewn dress in two days? Not to mention the man started his career making custom leather jackets, wouldn’t you expect his leather jeans to look great? I would guess the less experienced designers needed more conception time to put together a collection than someone who has been around the industry would but maybe it’s just me. Uli, who I also love, at least defended Jeffery by saying there were plenty of imperfections in his clothes. Michael was all about Laura’s accusations. I love Michael too but his clothes were ugly and I can’t believe what a follower he was. Then Laura goes and tells Tim Gunn without even telling Jeffery she has suspicions. It was like going to the teacher before telling your classmate you think they were doing something wrong and giving them a chance to defend themselves. Laura probably never would have mentioned it except that Uli told Jeffrey she had something to say.

Jeffrey was, of course, pissed. Many people seem to think that because he wasn’t all foul-mouthed and pissed it was an admission of his guilt because he usually is a sassy kind of guy. Personally, I think he was just shocked and attacked and stunned and just said no, are you crazy like anyone would. So they are investigating and there is concern that he may not be eligible to win the show anymore. Everyone knows he shows his collection at fashion week cause there have been pictures of it forever but damn. Just because a bitch has boring matronly designs and isn’t the sewing expert that someone who makes clothes for celebrities already is, doesn’t mean she should suspect them of cheating. Sure he doesn’t conform to conventional standards but that doesn’t mean he is a cheater. I don’t like plenty of rules/standards of culture but I don’t cheat at Monopoly.

I guess my point is that I believe you don’t make such a strong accusation as that on a hunch. And you certainly aren’t as smug about it as Laura was. We are all adults here people. There is a certain way that people are expected to behave. Unfortunately, all too often, people forget that they have a duty to the feelings of those around them. In my customer service class, one of the things we teach is loss prevention. Many documents I have read in regard to stopping a shoplifter say you never confront someone until you know what was taken, from where, and how. You certainly don’t just assume someone is stealing. In real life that can bring law suits. On reality shows it can boost ratings.

Obviously, to see how this all turn out we have to tune in next week. I truly hope that Jeffrey is vindicated (not only because I like him but because his collection is fantastic). I just think people shouldn’t act like a bunch of spoiled babies in life. If you have an issue you need to talk to people about it. Sure, if you suspect something you say something but you also do it in a mature and respectful way. Ok, off the moral soapbox. Singing is a soothing activity so we shall begin.

Oh the memories of yesterday made me very happy. I’ll leave song #10 up because no one guessed it. Then again the person it reminds me of probably doesn’t know this exists so I’m not all that surprised. Back to random shuffle.

1. Ok so Monica let me know I had this song wrong and I did. I thought the lyrics were "My defenses, become offences. Now I’m stumbling. I change my face up." the lyrics appear to be "My defenses become fences. I'm stumbling. I change my face. and Monica is right, it is Tricky and it happens to be called Christiansands. It was inspired by my dear friends Jenna and Roxanne cause they loved this shit and so do I.

2. Wait until the war is over. And we’re both a little older

3. Dance me to your beauty with a burning violin. Dance me through the panic till I’m gathered safely in. Dance Me to the End of Love, Leonard Cohen. Identified by Shadow Falcon

4. Don’t fall in love with me yet we only recently met. True I’m in love with you but you might decide I’m a nut

5. Winding paths through tables and glass. First flowers bloom. Now watch the summer pass so close to you. Country Girl, Crosby Stills Nash and Young. Identified by Monica

Oh, as you can see I have a new look. This look may change a lot in the next few weeks as I decide what I think is the prettiest. Let me know what you think.

MORE PROJECT RUNWAY TO TALK ABOUT

Ok so they put the posts of people's collections up on Blogging Project Runway so, of course, I had to add them here. I had to say, after viewing the collections I have a completely different idea of who could win this. For weeks I have been saying the final three will be Jeffrey Uli and Michael with it coming down to Michael and Jeffrey and Michael taking the win. I have completely changed my mind. I watched the slideshows of each designer twice and, if it were up to me, the order would be Uli then Jeffrey followed by the unexpected Laura and, unfortunately, with Michael bringing up the rear. I really hated to put things this way. I had no choice.

Uli's collection is not the exact same dress we have been seeing for the entire show. It has elements of that dress but she really changed it up and made a wonderful collection. There is maybe one strictly "rock n' roll" piece in Jeffrey's collection, and it's wonderful. So is everything else. The thing that could hurt him is, like Santino, his collection is very different than his challenge clothes. Laura had a wonderful classic collection; there were just too many feathers and sparkles for my taste. If I liked feathers and sparkles she would have probably been #1 on my list. Then we come to Michael. There is nothing particularly wrong with his collection but I just found it boring. Maybe it is just because I hate gold and am not all that fond of white.

I also have to keep in mind that not all four of them will make it to the "finals." They hinted that maybe only two would be there. On Blogging Project Runway many people speculated that every collection but Laura's contained swimsuits. That, of course, makes everyone believe that she was kicked out and the final challenge was to add a swimsuit to the collection. That makes a lot of sense and would make me feel better because the final three I chose would actually be the final three. Who knows? I think everyone should take a look at the designs and let me know what you think. They are interesting to watch at the least.

On an unrelated but tragic topic, my favorite Of Montreal song has been turned into an Outback Steakhouse commercial. I want to die. The song is still great though and I still love it.

And now, back to the shuffle game

Is Chicago. Is not Chicago, Soul Coughing- When I was in HS in Minneapolis, Soul Coughing was required listening. Even though the band was from NY, they had their biggest fan base in Mpls. Every show would sell out. They are just an incredibly fun and silly band that I will always enjoy. Most people, however, think they suck. Most people are wrong.

Midnight Blue, ELO- OK so ELO is kind of a guilty pleasure of mine. I own a 3 CD box set of ELO records. In my defense it was a really good deal. It was only like $10 more than the one ELO album I had intended to buy. I am glad I did. Most people, however, think they suck. Most people are right.

The Bad Photographer, St Enema Bag- Don't let the band name fool you, this is fantastic music. It has a happy upbeat groove going and you can't help but bop you head. This song sounds kind of like if “Letters To Cleo” were a really good band.

A RANDOM FRIDAY POST

So I totally ignored Project Runway yesterday, bad bad Natalie. It was so nice to watch with Monica instead of sending a ridiculous number of text messages and calling each other every commercial break. I very much was looking forward to a Project Runway pie next week but then was thwarted because the stupid show won’t be on again until the 27th. I don’t know what they are trying to do to people. Don’t they know we need our fix? As much as I hate Laura, she deserved her win very much. Dresses on that episode were not cute. Hers was adorable. It fit a little oddly in the stomach area but I’ll let that go. Maybe I am making it up. Having Vincent and Angela back on the show was a total and complete mess. I think they made the most awful things they could have possibly made. It was nice to se Vincent and his bogus ways again though. Seeing Kayne go was not a happy moment. It was a moment that I knew was coming and had to come but I did like that guy. He seemed like such a nice boy. In two weeks I am guessing Laura will be out of there. It could be Uli though. Michael will win simply because they will not let Jeffrey win. Michael deserves it though. I’m not saying he doesn’t. He is my favorite!

I read on Damien’s blog that some bus driver in Louisiana assigned the black children to seats in the back of the bus. Not only that but all nine black students in two seats. The little ones were made to sit on laps. That is so racist that I laughed for hours. I deal with racism by laughing because there is really little else that I can do. I also heard a story that one of my-coworkers was asked if the college she went to was a “school for coloreds.” Who says coloreds in 2006? Apparently old white security guards at the city courts that’s who.

To wrap up this insane day I will leave you with this thought. There is a Mexican restaurant in Milwaukee called Nacho Mama and, in this restaurant, there is a little person who wears a wooden sombrero with chips and salsa. Apparently you just take a dip as the guy walks by. Or, as another co-worker mentioned, you just follow him around the restaurant snacking. This gave me a wonderful picture of hilarity. I almost want to go to Milwaukee. But I don’t.

And now, for the reveling of the unguessed songs, I’m sure you are drooling with anticipation.

1. A flask I drink of sober tea while relay cameras monitor me. There was no way anyone was ever going to guess this song. While I was sure I knew what it was it took me forever to actually find it out. It is Group Four by Massive Attack.

2. Standing like John Wayne she is full frame she is center stage. There are some people out there who could guess this song but it wasn’t easy. It is If It Isn’t Her by Ani DiFranco

3. Your Flesh Finds Me Out. Teases the crack in me. Smittens me with hope. I kind of thought this one was easier than it appeared to be. It is Possibly Maybe by Bjork.

4. Has he lost his mind? Can he see or is he blind? Can he walk at all or if he moves will he fall. This one, although it hasn’t been up long is the easiest song ever and I am shocked that it remained blank. It is Iron Man by Black Sabbath. Oh, it didn't remain blank. Jaclyn identified it. I just didn't see her comment until after I posted this. One may assume that she cheated but she didn't. She certainly knows this song.

JEFFREY ON THE COME UP

So I'm a day late on my Project Runway update but what an episode it was. Although one of my favorites (because of personality not clothing) was booted, it was his time to go. Vincent was a treasure trove of comedic genius. From the basket hat in Episode 1 to his recent erotic connections to his clothing, the man was always good for a laugh. His clothing reflected the fact that he had been out of the fashion world for the past 20 years (I mean he put shoulder pads in an evening gown that happened to be glued together) but he seemed like a fine person and I would like to have dinner with him. I truly would have liked to see Laura go, her clothes are always boring and make me want to die. Unfortunately, the judges tend to like her. I don't get it.

Although Michael made a hideous dress, his past successes and his sincere effort allowed him to pass through on this challenge. Oh and the fact that most of the clothes in this episode were awful didn't hurt. I was scared for him for a second but I knew that the judges wouldn't let such talent go. Uli and Jeffrey were hands down the victors in this challenge. I think Uli's dress was more wearable but, to me, couture clothes shouldn't necessarily be that wearable. I always think of them as those fabulous things you see on a runway show and would laugh your ass off at someone on the street sporting the exact same garment. Maybe my definition is off. Who cares? Jeffrey went crazy with his yellow plaid print that reminded me of these awful orange plaid bellbottom pants that I had the audacity to rock in college. I wore a lot of strange things in college. I must say my taste has matured, although my affinity for embroidery and headscarves will always remain. I just won't wear it every day.

I have chosen my final PR contestants. Michael, Jeffrey and Uli. I wouldn't be all that surprised if the judges let that monstrosity called Laura in but I really hope not. An entire collection of low cut cocktail dresses would put me straight to sleep. I am really pulling for Michael to win this season. I think he is just awesome. I hope the judges don't disappoint.

As for our musical foray, only one of the original 10 songs remains thanks to Jaclyn and Stephanie. I think I'll give it until Tuesday to be guessed and then reveal it to the world. It is a rather random and obscure song though. Extra cool points to anyone who can figure it out. Two new songs to add. Horray.

1. A flask I drink of sober tea while relay cameras monitor me.

2. Standing like John Wayne she is full frame she is center stage.

3. Your Flesh Finds Me Out. Teases the crack in me. Smittens me with hope.

4. 25 years and my life is still trying to get up this great big hill of hope for a destination.

5. Beautiful girl love your dress high school smiles oh yes. Gone Daddy Gone, Violent Femmes. (although it could have been Gone Daddy Gone by Gnarls Barkley but it wasn't) Identified by Hella

And for something else totally random.

Your Linguistic Profile:

55% General American English

20% Yankee

15% Upper Midwestern

5% Dixie

0% Midwestern

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

I guess this makes sense since I went to college in NY and grew up in MN. I have no idea how that Dixie got in there though? The South scares me.

THERE'S ROSETTES, THAT’S FOR REMEMBERANCE

Now get your goofy ass off the runway! Angela of the horrid rosettes is finally off Project Runway. I really enjoyed watching her fly all the way to Paris only to have to get on the plane and fly directly home. HAHAHA. That's bogus though, really. At least on ANTM they give them a night in the new exotic location before shipping them home. Oh well. Seriously though, that outfit was a complete mess. She put rosette flowers on her ass. I mean who is she kidding? Not on a pocket on her ass, just as ass decoration. That is never cute. Not only was the outfit a mess but the accessories were a mess too. Did anyone see those shoes? Blah. Honestly I was pretty sure Kane was going home, he looked like Gay Elvis on Meth but I like him so whatever. I don't know what he was thinking though. Then he had the nerve to wear a bling belt that said Kayne. I mean that is not only years late, it was never cool in the first place. Jeffrey finally won a challenge, and it was 100% deserved. I was very happy for him. He looked fantastic and the fact that he pulled that outfit together in one day just amazed me. Michael did a great job also, his outfit really worked for him. As much as the judges didn't like Uli's outfit I would have worn it in a minute. I really like her style. Laura, well it was Laura. I don't like her. The dress was really nice though. I would have worn it too. Not those shoes though. Boring, blah.

Project Runway in Paris promises to be excellent. I am looking forward to the next few weeks very much. I mean it isn't really the type of show where location matters all that much since most of it is shot at their workstations but change is always good. The people on Blogging Project Runway can stop complaining about seeing the same Mandy Moore poster. Maybe they moved it to Paris though. That would be hilarious.

Odd sidebar moment. On the way to work I see a homeless woman in her usual panhandling spot, not unusual, except today she had an iPod Nano. Maybe it was a gift?

On another side note it is my two-year anniversary with Tony. Horary for that! We don't really know when the exact date is so we do it like Thanksgiving, the last Thursday in August. I suppose we could figure the exact date out from that but this is more fun.

Let's play some happy love music for us. Today I will cheat and skip songs because I don't want to write about "Gimmie That Nut" for our anniversary, not that it came on but it could.

Asleep and Dreaming, Magnetic Fields- Ok I skipped 35 songs to get to one that I thought was worth anything. It would have been a bad day for the shuffle game. This song is wonderfully sickening and mushy though. Although I never see him asleep and dreaming (unless I somehow get home when he is already asleep which is rare) but apparently he sees me asleep and dreaming all the time AAAWW how sweet (puke puke gross. Sorry about that disgusting display of love)

Rainbows, Madvillian- Although this is not a sappy song in any way we really love the Madvilliany album so it works.

Amorino, Isobel Campbell- This song is just beautiful. We really like this album too. We like it so much that we went to an Isobel Campbell concert not that long ago. Unfortunately, her new album is nothing like this one. It is mostly weird folkish horrid music. Not that I don't like folk music, I do, this was just horrible. She didn't play a single song from the first album. She cleared out most of the room. We stayed because we kept thinking it would get better. It didn't.

ONE DAY YOU'RE IN

As it is once again Thursday, I of course have to put up my weekly Project Runway post. This week's episode was rather disappointing. I didn't like any of the designs very much and it was all together boring. I was also incredibly disappointed on how poorly these typically awesome designers did with large women. I know that what looks good on their typical models is not going to look good on these large mothers they had to deal with but a designer should at least know how to dress every type of body. I mean they had the measurements. Uli was the only one who had a larger woman to work with and didn't put her in a complete tent. It was still a little more fabric than I would have used but hey, it was ok. Maybe that's because she is the only woman that had a big model to work with. She at least tried to elongate and slim the body the boys just said let's layer a bunch of fabric on this big woman. Last I checked, you generally want to keep things with less layers to slim someone but maybe that is just me.

I was convinced that Jeffrey was going home. Although he made the most hideous outfit I had ever seen, he should have had immunity from the garbage challenge the week before so I think it was only fair that he did not get the boot. I love Robert as a person but I have not been at all inspired by anything he has designed so, whatever I suppose. Now, Angela's mother, while correct in a way, was a complete ass. Jeffrey was also an ass. When she asked for a particular color scheme and it didn't work out in the store she should have understood. Jeffrey also should have explained what happened better by saying "the dark green's they had weren't a real match" rather than saying "the dark green didn't match" because you got the idea she liked to pair dark purple and dark green and he hurt her feelings by saying she had no idea how to match clothes. He could have explained his choices better and not had attitude. However, he did try and Angela's mother could have been just a bit nicer to him. I really wish that Angela's mother and Jeffrey's mother had got in an all out brawl. That may have made the episode more entertaining.

I was incredibly happy that Vincent won the challenge. I think I may be the only person on the planet who loves Vincent's insane antics but he is just great to me. He is completely nuts and I just want to pat his crazy little head. Maybe it was because he was designing for a mother that his slightly 80s ways worked but he was just so happy and truly did a great job.

Basically, I waited all week for Wednesday to come and, when it did, I was greeted with one of the dullest hours of TV I had seen in ages. My TV night was slightly redeemed when Colbert devoted an episode to the "crumbbelievability" of Pop Culture but not entirely. I truly hope that next weeks episode returns to the caliber of TV entertainment I have grown accustomed to.

Maybe musical entertainment will be more fulfilling.

Thriller, Michael Jackson- Well I suppose you don't get much more entertaining than Thriller. I actually enjoy all the bad movies and weddings that contain a thriller segment. It is always good for a laugh. For some background, Thriller was my favorite record when I was 5. Our house was robbed and the stereo was stolen. My Thriller album was on the record player. I had a fit. My fantastic parents got me a new Thriller album right away. I had nothing to play this album on but I had it and I was happy.

Temporary Like Achilles, Bob Dylan- I think Blonde on Blonde is one of the greatest albums there is. I love the bluesy lilting stylings and basically it makes me miss a lot of wonderful people.

Monolith, The Beta Band- Most people I know really like that song by The Beta Band that is in High Fidelity (great movie) and are not really fans of their other music. Maybe the things I downloaded are particularly and unusually good but I really enjoy it. It makes me smile and bop my head. I really like any music I can bop my head to. I am kind of easy to please that way. Then again, I wonder if I have just never hard this before. It sucks. It is like some remake of Revolution 9.

I WON

Ok, first order of business today is that I won the Train War and, Man, was that lady pissed. See I am always there before her, and I slid slightly to the left like I planned to. I was perfectly positioned for the train door. I saw her slinky little shadow behind me trying to edge in from the right (she was really trying) but I stood my ground and claimed my space and easily sauntered straight back to the one seater. She have me a really evil look and I gave her a very smug one. Part of me believes that whoever has been standing on the platform longer should technically get their pick of the train. I know this never happens and I often get right in front of people who I know have been there longer but in her case she should yield to me. When someone eventually sat next to her she looked even more pissed. It was not a nasty person whatsoever, he was very clean cut and seemed to keep to his side of the seat. She, however, kept looking him up and down like a hungry lion. Wouldn’t it be funny if she were out there somewhere blogging about how I stole her seat? That would really make me smile.

Second order of business for today is the “Lunch n’ Learn”. How cute is that? It means just what it says, people have lunch and someone learns em. Today the one learnin’ em will be me. I can’t believe I am still in this stupid job I was supposed to have temporarily for two weeks. So I am going to speak to the “Women’s Development Council” at an Insurance company about how they can get involved. YIPPIE! I hate things like this. I would rather be lunchin’ than learnin’. I am not really the hugest fan of speaking in front of large groups. I do, however really want to be a teacher. I don’t see them as the same thing though. I love teaching the youth. I do not want to learn the Women’s Development Council. A room full of suits looking for ways to give back to the community kind of makes me ill. I mean it shouldn’t because maybe a few of them genuinely care and want to give back to the community but really, does anyone think they do it because they really want to? Isn’t it more that they do it because they sound cool talking to their friends about how they help the low-income youth? I find it very ironic that while 98% of our volunteers work somewhere that has entry-level jobs like the mailroom, receptionist, etc, that they do not hire our youth. Something is incongruous there don’t you think? They will give them practice, tell me how great they all are, even raise money for them, but they don’t seem to want them working for their company. Oh well. I spent an hour yesterday sticking little labels with my name on the old Volunteer Services Directors business cards so that I could pass something out to these ladies. It is so ghetto. I mean I understand that temporary people at a non-profit don’t get business cards but then you shouldn’t expect me to go do Lunch n’ Learns.

Final order of business for today, being that it is Thursday, is Project Runway. Yesterday’s episode was a true bummer for me. I want to punch Laura in the face. Granted she makes ok things, but how many of the same dress is she going to make and have the judges love it? She is one smug bitch. Then, as much as I ADORE Michael, Jeffrey’s outfit was volumes better. I mean he was the only one whose dress moved like it wasn’t made out of garbage. Oh, the challenge was to make dresses out of garbage by the way. Then to kick off poor Allison sucked. There was really no other option, at this point everyone is good and I like all of them, except Laura who was certainly not getting kicked off yesterday. It was between Allison and Vincent. I LOVE Vincent. He is neurotic, insane, and designs odd things but I love him because he entertains me. Is he a better designer than Allison? Yesterday he was. In general, probably not so much.

Oh, I guess there is one more order of business, the shuffle game.

Get Crunked (Chopped & Screwed), Lil’ Flip- Ok Chopped and Screwed music is a weakness of mine. I find it utterly ridiculous. Music made in particular for people who are high on cough syrup is a concept too genius to ignore. Plus, lines like “She a HOHOHO He a HOHOHO buck buck she a HOHOHO” is priceless. Sometimes I like to get the regular version of a song and the chopped and screwed version and compare them. My favorite instance of this is Big Moe’s Barre Baby. After listening to the Chopped & Screwed version the regular one sounds like it is sung by Alvin, Simon, and Theodore

Guilty Conscience, Eminem- Sophomore year all over again. Eminem, Friend, Jackie, and the gravity bong. UH OH. I shouldn’t be posting such things. Oh well, that was all in the past.

Boom Boom, The Yardbirds- To round off a day of particularly crappy music I am glad something like this came on. The Yardbirds RULE. It’s all bluesy and British and FAB. I dig baby, dig.

Ok this was so "relevant" that I had to log on post Lunch n' Learn. While I was speaking this lady took a sandwich out of a bag to eat for lunch. It was a perfectly packaged sandwich. She had bread and meats like most sandwiches but atop the bread she had layered two lettuce, tomato, lettuce stacks that she then slid into each half of her sandwich. Why had I never thought of that? Kudos to that lady!

TODAY IS A BAD DAY

Today while the volunteers I schedule were interviewing the people in the employment program that goes on here I wrote the first verse of "Today is a Bad Day" an obvious parody of "Today was a Good Day". I thought about posting it but it sucks too much and is utterly pathetic. I am trying to think of things about today that are good and all I can come up with is tomorrow is Friday and that really isn't exciting to me right now. You know you aren't having a good day when Friday doesn't matter. I have been up since 4am and feel like hell. The weather is shitty and looks like tornados. Bradley of the fantastic one-liners will no longer be seen on Project Runway. My nice TV doesn't work right. Some guy almost pushed me off the train platform running to catch the train (well that was yesterday) and he fell down right when he got by the train door so I guess that is actually really funny. It doesn't change that this day really fucking sucks. Even the thought of Superheroes doesn't make me happy. I spent this morning listening to Boys For Pele and if you know the album it doesn't need to be explained. If you don't know it, I'm not going to explain.

Maybe the shuffle game will force me to listen to something happy.

Home Computer, Kraftwerk- Now if Pocket Calculator had come on I would have cracked a smile. I am almost smiling at the thought of pocket calculator. This song, however, has a rather dull and depressing beat and talks about them beaming themselves into the future. I would like to do that, hopefully by the future everything will be nice and normal or else terrorists will have blown us all up and it won't matter.

One Line, PJ Harvey- This simply doesn’t help one bit. It’s a really good song though.

As If You Read My Mind, Stevie Wonder- Damn this is even a really happy song. I'm still having a really bad day. In fact it's so happy I don't know if I can even listen to the whole stupid song.

BLAH

A SQUID WITHOUT AN OCEAN

So yesterday was Wednesday, my favorite day of the week. Why is it my favorite? PROJECT RUNWAY that's why. And what an episode we had. Monica had already clued me into the wonders of Bradley's quaint little comments. I really enjoyed his discussion of how maybe he should shave his beard and have just a mustache. Although I don't want to marry him like she does, he has certainly risen in my esteem. I am, however devastated that Angela has immunity because I do not particularly like her. I mean how many of those poof skirts does she have? She has great glasses and is pretty but DAMN. I also have mixed feelings about seeing Keith go. The eye candy was great but he was a slimy nasty cheat and that is just not acceptable. Good riddance, cutie pie. My dream that everyone thought I was having an affair with him is even sadder now. I would never ever have an affair with a big cheater like that. Next week also promised to be wonderful, as usual. After Project Runway I was a little sad because I knew the rest of the night could not compare. Boy was I wrong.

Enter my new favorite show, although I am not exactly sure of the name. It’s that one with Stan Lee and the wannabe Superheroes. When I watched the commercials I didn't think the show would have anything truly entertaining to offer. Was I ever mistaken. I always enjoyed Fat Mama, even in the commercials "Fat Mama, Fat Mama I'm here to save the day. Fat Mama, Fat Mama I'll take your food away". That’s pure gold. Not to mention she has donuts hanging from her costume. I immediately regretted not knowing about this show and being able to try out. I would have thrown together something resembling my SLC outfits and been emerged as PEACE GIRL!!! Born from the dawning of the Age of Aquarius, Peace Girl comes to bring love and happiness to all those in need. I shower them with my flower power (you bet I would be throwing flowers at people) and bring them the joy that is missing in their otherwise dull and angst-ridden lives. Stan Lee could not have resisted. Anyway, I digress. The first challenge was changing in public without being seen and then running to the finish line. The goal, do it FAST. I would have rocked that shit. However I was dismayed at how many superheroes stuck to the mission and passed the obviously placed crying little girl who had lost her mother. I mean come on; Superheroes will stop everything to help someone in distress, particularly a child with pigtails. Only like four of them stopped to help her to the security office that was right in front of them. DUH. Of course Fat Mama saved the little girl. But then, my surprise favorite arose from the masses, Major Victory! Not only did he dash around making hilarious super hero gestures but he swooped the little girl into his arms and carried her to the security office. Major Victory, hats off to you my man! You are a true hero. Anyway, the sad part of things is that I have another show to watch. But man, what a good one. I think the new episode may actually come on today. I hope so. I love that show. Oh, did I mention Monkey Woman changed her outfit in a tree HAHAHAHA.

One more odd thing before I get to the music, This morning on the train the woman next to me was swaying and dancing way too close to me. I didn't like it very much. However, it reminded me of the guy on the blue line that would mouth words with a very big saliva ridden mouth and just go crazy with his headphones. That made me smile. And now, for the music.

Cryin', Aerosmith- You can hate all you want but I love the shit out of this song. It was a fantastic video and my dear little sister and I spent a summer watching it on MTV and singing at the top of our lungs. We will still sing about how we were CRYING because you are so AMAZING that I go CRAZY cause you got me LIVIN ON THE EDGE.

4 Otha Fish, The Pharcyde- FANTASTIC album and any time when you get to say cranium without sounding silly is just too good to be true.

By The Time I Get To Phoenix, Isaac Hayes- Any time Isaac begins a song talking all soulful about how much a man loves a woman and how she did him wrong wrong wrong you know you have a hit. But as you listen and discover that this poor man left his low down cheatin' woman Seven times and went back Seven times before having to flee to Phoenix, now that's a classic