I LIKE MY JOB

My issue of Money arrived today. I don’t know why but I am very excited about receiving it. I haven’t had a regular subscription to a magazine since the days of Cricket and Ranger Rick. Man, were those ever good magazines. I kind of wish I still got Cricket but I think I might be a little mature for Ranger Rick. Then again, animals are pretty awesome. Regardless, my magazine came and I can’t wait to read it.

The April issue of Money is filled with exciting articles like How to Pay Zero Taxes, Smart Moves in a Mean Economy, and Steer Clear of the New Gold Rush. Only a year ago I would have not even thought about reading a magazine like this but, now that it is my job, I can’t wait to go through this thing cover to cover. I’m certainly not the pinnacle of financial knowledge but being good at my job is important to me and I like learning. I’m actually going to start working on my certification to become a financial planner during the summer quarter. Who would have thunk it? I’m a firm believer in teaching what I do and I know I have some work to do in order to get my financial house in ideal shape but knowing how to do that is important.

Oh, potentially important news for people is this FICO ’08 thing that the credit bureaus are rolling out. It won’t make huge changes for most people but the big thing is that if anyone is/has an authorized user on a credit account that information will no longer factor into the authorized users credit history. Many people add family to their cards to bring up bad credit or create non-existent credit. Once this plan is actually implemented, that "piggybacked" credit information will drop off reports. Seems some people with good credit have essentially renting their credit out and people with bad scores are paying to be added as authorized users to help them improve their score. Apparently privacy laws make it impossible to tell who is family and who is a scammer so all authorized users are going to lose the benefit. Joint users, however will have see no change. This is a big thing for a lot of the students I work with who are authorized users on their parent’s cards.

On another topic, my iPod has gone crazy and has started to play albums out of order. It doesn’t always bother me but I certainly won’t be listening to Dark Side of the Moon anytime soon.

1. You had all of them on your side/ Didn’t you/ Didn’t you/ You believed in all your lies/ Didn’t you/ Didn’t you

2. I’m in a crisis/ I need help/ Come on mood shift/ Shift back to good again. Heimsdalsgate Like a Promethian Curse, Of Montreal. Identified by Monica

3. Rose/ I’m feeling older/ I was lucky/ Like a four leaf clover. Razzle Dazzle Rose, Camera Obscura. Identified by Janna

4. I am just a poor boy/ Though my story’s seldom told/ I have squandered my resistance/ For a pocket full of mumbles/Such are promises. The Boxer, Simon and Garfunkle. Identified by Chatty Knitter

5. 50 years they’ve been married/ They can’t wait for their 51st to roll around/ Yeah, roll around. 51st Anniversary, Jimi Hendrix. Identified by Jamie

SINCE THE FEAST

I learned a few things during this year’s Thanksgiving.

1. Don’t make a dish you haven’t prepared before but you saw done on the Food Network with much larger vegetables than the ones you could find. It just won’t work out quite right. My artichokes were not served although I did take them home and manage to make a few incredibly tasty bites.

2. If you want Tony to do karaoke you have to pick a Beastie Boys song.

3. Even when you think there is plenty of food, plenty of drunken people will eat things you had planned to eat for leftovers

4. Good food and good fun will make fast friends

5. Sometimes to have proper leftover plates the next day you need to go back to the store and get some more potatoes.

I started my new job at DePaul University on Monday. The first day was a general new employee orientation where people from all departments came and talked to us about new hire things. It was a day with a lot of paper. Tuesday we did our Electronic stuffs orientation which didn’t take too long at all and then were to report to our respective departments. I wasn’t scheduled to be in my department until noon due to my supervisor having a meeting and we got out at 10:30. I took a seat in Starbucks, had a chai, did the crossword puzzle and read Prometheus Bound. I then met my manger, went to lunch, got introduced around the loop office and then was shown to my office at the Lincoln Park campus. There were more introductions and I was given the Staples catalogue to order things for my desk. I spent a long time deciding if I want black mesh desk accessories or black solid ones with rounded corners. I am going with the mesh because it fits my futuristic office furniture a little better.

Today I went in to my office and read over things for about an hour. I left at 10am to get to the Loop campus and meet my supervisor at 10:30. I was late. I have no idea how that happened but she told me that sometimes it can take up to 45min. Granted, I was only five min late but it didn’t make me feel too spiffy. We spent the morning going over departmental structure, my goals until June ’08 and the things our program is measured by. Then we started in on the Financial Literacy workshops that I will be teaching. We got through one before lunch. It is like the financial stuff I was teaching before but much more in-depth. After lunch we’ll go into the three others.

Things are looking pretty good. Everyone here is incredibly nice and welcoming. One of the guys the Lincoln Park office has a banjo. Monica would totally want to hang out with this guy. Although there is a ton to learn and not all that much time to learn it before I have to get out there and teach/supervise/create I think that I’m really going to enjoy it and that is a great feeling.

1. Make a list little Lars never seen a star/ Put his fans behind bars/ Can’t you see mp3 means you’re stealing from me/ you should have bought a Cd

2. Daddy’s ghost behind you/ sleeping dog beside you/ You’re a point of mystery/ You’re the prayer inside me

3. Does it make you happy to ignore me on streets/ I guess by now you think I’m weak/ I wish you could have said something before now

4. So I go/ Though it hurts me so/ I'm crying/ For your love

5. Girl I must warn you/ I sense something strange in my mind/ Situation is serious/ Let's do it cause we're running out of time. Poison, BBD. Identified by Monica.

THE WONDERS OF INVINCIBILITY

I have always appreciated the power of meditation. I’m not a serious practitioner and certainly don’t know the ins and outs of “proper techniques” but I do feel that it is something that can bring people a sense of peace and enlightenment. For me, it is something to do instead of punching a wall, yelling uncontrollably, or spending copious amounts of money that I don’t have. Sometimes I know that you need to breathe, do some serious introspection, and try to become aware of yourself.

Because of these reasons, it is with great joy that I want to share the word about Invincible Donovan University set to open in Scotland. Invincible is the brainchild of two exceedingly awesome individuals, Donovan and David Lynch. According to an article in The Scotsman, “Students in the college will study education, health, economics and music and arts, along with ‘total knowledge’ and the ‘unified field’. It will promote national ‘invincibility’ and world peace.” How incredibly awesome is that. Not only will the students be getting relevant educations on basic Liberal Arts topics but they will also become invincible. Where was this school when I went to college? You are different so are we my ass. I want enlightened invincibility and world peace. Sure it isn’t built yet and doesn’t have accreditation but it is just a matter of time until that happens.

"For a country the size of Scotland it would take only 250 students meditating to protect Scotland from its enemies and to bring peace, to stop violence and drug abuse," Lynch said. "That is just a byproduct of the students meditating together." I wonder how many people we need meditating around the world to bring about the salvation of us all. Do I think it will truly work to the level that Lynch and Donovan claim? Probably not, but I don’t think it would hurt anything either. I think it is a really beautiful wonderful idea.

1. My dick costs a late night fee/ Your dick got the HIV/ My dick plays on the double feature screen/ Your dick went straight to DVD. My Dick, Mickey Avalon

2. Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Trippin’ over rails and fences/ Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Made of the mist in the abyss. Slippin Through The Sensors. Fruit Bats

3. I feel unhappy/ I feel so sad/ I’ve lost the best friend/ That I ever had. Changes, Black Sabbath

4. I really know how it feels to be/ Stressed out stressed out/ when you’re face to face with your adversity. Stressed Out, Tribe Called Quest

5. Sucking on my titties like you wanted me calling me/ all the time like Blondie/ Check out my chrissy behind it's fine. Fuck The Pain Away, Peaches

DINNER WITH GERMANS

On Friday night I went for Indian food with my new work friend, Franz the German exchange social worker, Bianca a German exchange worker in Franz’s program, Monica, and Tony. We had an awesome time. The food was delicious, Monica didn’t get an allergic reaction, and we had some excellent laughs.

During dinner Tony asked Franz and Bianca if the German exchange student he knew in High School was a typical guy. See Tony had these suspicions that this guy was a total nerd. He would say things like “I am a scooter boy and scooter boys are the coolest!” while dancing the “scooter dance” He also LOVED Boney M. As Tony had suspected, scooter boys are not cool at all, particularly if they are huge Boney M fans. They are kind of like a more pathetic version of emo kids. Tony felt much better because he was certain that this guy was a wiener but didn’t want to hold these suspicions if he truly was cool in Germany. Tony also had a great moment discussing scooters when he said, “you know, scooters, vroom vroom” and the Germans looked at him like, duh of course. Tony was confused because we were also talking about some German pop sensation named Scooter and he was just trying to be clear but, in actually, Tony was the only one who was confused.

After we left the restaurant we took a short walk down Devon Avenue because Franz wanted to see what was around. I explained that it would look something like this, sari store, restaurant, jewelry store, sari store, etc. I was actually wrong because the jewelry stores didn’t start for a few blocks and instead there were little convenience stores in their place. Regardless we got the picture and decided to wait for the bus.

I asked Monica if she had read the Hillbilly article I posted that day and we started laughing at how horrible it was. Franz asked, “What is a hillbilly?” so Monica, Tony, and I let the stereotypes fly. I have never claimed to be particularly politically correct. Sure racism makes me mad and I get a good laugh out of it but I’m not above the occasional stereotype. Hypocritical? Sure, but at least I’m honest. I will also admit that we were kind of explaining white trash or rednecks and not hillbillies but we did later correct ourselves while explaining that the terms were somewhat interchangeable but not entirely.

As Tony said, “it is always okay to make fun of white trash,” Monica and I agreed. It just is. You can argue but you will be wrong .We explained that you can spot one by their plaid shirts, mesh caps, wife-beaters (cause they like to beat their wives), cheap beer, (I also learned that beer is considered food in Germany) and eagerness to call you a faggot and kick your ass. I told Franz that this last thing would particularly apply to him being male and European. Monica added that they would also probably call him British because all Europeans are British to white trash. Tony told Bianca that, as a German woman, white trash would probably expect her to walk around carrying beer steins and wearing lederhosen at all times. People at the bus stop looked at us like we were insane and they had every right to do so. Franz saw a guy in a motorcycle and asked us what kind of person he was to which we replied, “he’s just a guy on a bike,” which he was. “VROOM VROOM” was all Franz had to say about that, which was incredibly hilarious. Monica made sure to let the Germans know that you can’t always tell white trash by looking at them but once they say “hey faggot I’m gonna kick you ass,” you would know. She is right.

When we got on the bus we had to be quiet in case there were any white trash types on the bus. It appeared to be safe so we kept talking. We learned that the German equivalent of white trash is loosely translated as “land egg” I would type the German word but I couldn’t even pronounce it and Franz is gone for the day. I like the term though, it makes sense.

Now I realize that we are probably horrible people for teaching the Germans this stuff. We felt kind of like the 8th graders telling the 2nd graders bad words but it was so incredibly funny that we couldn’t stop. ot that Franz and Bianca are like second graders but, you know what I mean. I’m sure that someone will call me a faggot and kick my ass any day now for payback. That will suck.

CATCH YOU ON THE FLIP SIDE

Everyone knows that I love TV. Most people know that I love reality TV. I do not apologize for these feelings. That is just how it is. My big three as far as reality shows go are Project Runway, Top Chef, and America’s Next Top Model. I watch plenty of others but those have been the only ones I can’t miss, until now.

Although it may surprise Monica, my new guilty pleasure is not Rock of Love, although I will certainly catch that if it happens to be on or watch it On Demand when I have nothing else to do. That is some funny stuff. No, my new love is none other than VH1’s The Pick-up Artist. I know, I know, the subject matter is disgusting. Why would someone like me who finds the club scene revolting and is all for the feminism (in the true sense) want to watch a show that teaches men how to pick up women? The answer is simple. Pure entertainment.

I hear the main guy, Mystery, is the fella they molded Tom Cruise’s character in Magnolia after. Apparently, his system for picking up women is foolproof and there are nerds all over the world following his plan and having crazy sex. From what I understand the system doesn’t lend itself well to establishing real relationships, which could be a problem. Then again, if you don’t want a relationship, who cares? The thing is, the guys on the show seem to want to meet someone special, or at least some of them seem to feel that way.

Sadly, my favorite trainee, Spoon, left last night on what was only the second episode. Masi Oka’s reject twin was a ray of light on that show. His crippling phobia of the female was absolutely endearing, and he seemed like a genuinely fun person. This is Spoon after his makeover. The other assorted freaks and geeks are more pathetic and I find it much harder to cheer for them. Joe D, who can only be described as the token rosy-cheeked-jolly-fun-tubby-guy-who-never-gets-laid (every frat has one) might be my new favorite. Spoon was so terrified about talking to girls in clubs that he decided to leave the show rather than subject himself to talking to more girls in stressful situations. I liked how he exited though. He said he had already seen a change in his confidence level and that he would be taking it slowly on his own time. The pressure of the show was just too much for him. I can respect that. I’m just sad because I wanted to see him turn into a playa!!!

I will be out of commission for a little while as Tony and I are about to GO ON VACATION!!!! Yeah!!!! We will be driving to Minneapolis tomorrow for a few days with the family and then heading up to a friends “cabin up north by the lake” (some people will know why that is funny) for a weekend of boating and general nothingness. Awesome. See you on the 27th (or maybe before if I feel like it).

Peace.

FOODIE FRIDAY- STUFFED MUSHROOMS

It has been a few weeks since a proper Foodie Friday and I felt it was time to bring out one of my staples that I surprisingly haven’t posted yet. I’m talking stuffed mushrooms.

-1 container large mushrooms, (you can do it with the regular ones but that is a lot of stuffing action) washed, stems removed and diced
-1tbsp olive oil
-1 stalk celery diced
-1 medium onion diced
-2 cloves garlic diced
-1tsp rosemary
-¼ cup bleu cheese crumbled (can be made without or with more, brie also tastes mighty good in these)
-3tbps vegetable stock for stuffing and ½ cup for cooking in
-¼ cup (if I remember correctly but I could be totally wrong) cup Italian seasoned bread crumbs

-Preheat oven to 375
-Heat oil over medium heat in a large saucepan
-Add onion and cook about 5 minutes
-Add celery and garlic cook about one minute
-Add mushroom stems and rosemary, cook until tender, about 5 minutes
-Stir in bleu cheese and cook about 1 min until well blended
-Add bread crumbs and cook for about 1 min
-Add 3tbsp vegetable stock and stir until ingredients make a nice paste type substance (you may need to add more crumbs or stock as this is all from memory and I haven’t made them in over a year)
-Spoon filling into mushroom caps placed in a large baking pan
-Pour stock into baking pan making sure the bottoms of the mushrooms are well covered
-Put in oven and cook for about 15-20 minutes
-Baste with stock a few times during the cooking process to make sure they are nice and juicy
Enjoy

I spend a lot of time on this blog talking about my work. Sometimes I don’t feel I do a very good job of explaining what it is that I do. Basically I teach a Customer Service Certification course at a workforce development focused non-profit and manage a contract for the state making sure our files are in order. However, my class and contract are part of a much bigger whole. It is an important whole and it doesn't get talked about very much on here. A prospective film person did a pro bono video for us and I figured I wanted to share.


1. Down in the cellar in the Boho zone/ I went looking for some sweet inspiration/ Oh well, just another hard time and with Negro affectations

2. I just wanna fuck bad bitches/ all them nights I never had bitches/ Now I’m all up in that ass bitches/ Mad at your boyfriend ain’t you

3. Well showing how it used to be/ So hard/ This hard /Used to get those kicks for free/ But now I’m towing the line

4. Oh we could rock/ Or we could bomb/ Or we could try/ Like super hard.

5. I know what you want/ The magpies have come/ If you know me so well then tell me which hand I use. Yes, Anastasia. Tori Amos. Identified by Brooke.

STOPPING VIOLENCE

The past few days I have spent my mornings at the Illinois Center for Violence Prevention at a training on how to integrate violence prevention in social service agencies. I found some of the information to be very interesting, some to be entirely too obvious to talk about, and some to be downright strange. I thought I would highlight a few of these things.

One of the statistics mentioned was that last year there were 9 shooting deaths in the entire country of Canada (Not Fearing Change questioned this and she is WAY correct. I found 172 in 2004 and that was the most recent data I found in a 1 min search. I would think it has stayed in that range. Still far lower than the US but what kind of training center so grossly misrepresents?). While I don’t have the exact numbers, I would imagine there are more than nine each day in the United States (I would hope there aren't close to 200 gun deaths a day in the US but we could get there in a month easily). Obviously Canadian gun laws are far stricter than those in the US but, if you ask me, the number of lives saved is far more important than having the liberal gun laws that we have today. I firmly believe that if our founding fathers knew how the second amendment was being applied in modern society they would be enraged. One of the main goals of the training was to change the view of violence as a social issue to a public health issue, thereby ensuring more funding and widespread concern about violence in general.

Violence is a health issue. It is a killer and, if the state of Illinois can spend 9million on enforcing seat-belt laws, they can certainly spend a few billion on violence prevention training and education for the people who most need it. Everyone needs to be aware of these things but, like all education, it is important that we start early. Back when I was in grade school we got to middle school and were suddenly old enough to learn about EVERYTHING. We learned about sex, we learned about drugs, we learned about isms of all kinds. We didn’t learn about violence. At the same time, most of us already knew about these things. If education is going to work you have to teach children as soon as possible. Our facilitator recently worked with a group in the Netherlands to incorporate violence prevention education in their schools at every level. Last I checked the Netherlands was nowhere near as violent a society as ours. Yet, the society that needs the most education is getting the least.

Some of the things that I found too obvious to talk about were the numbers and types of violence that get reported in comparison to larger sample surveys done. It seems common sense to me that most of the violence that occurs doesn’t get reported. One of the reasons for that is that I feel the Center for Violence Prevention had a broader definition of what could actually be violence than I would. Sure, I get the difference between physical, emotional, and psychological violence. But I’m not going to report every person who I see yelling at their child in the supermarket because I am not trying to get in a fight. I realize that there are times when being a casual observer is not an option, but I also have common sense and understand what is and what isn’t my business.

The biggest thing that I found downright strange was our discussion of sibling violence. Yes, I know that getting violent with a sibling is wrong but our facilitator seemed of the mindset that there is no such thing as “they’re just being kids,” and I disagree with that. My sister and I fought. We didn’t fight a lot; we didn’t ever put each other in the hospital. When we did fight we would get in trouble and be punished accordingly. We knew fighting was wrong. It seemed tome that our facilitator thought that the world wouldn’t be ok until there was never a case of a sibling hitting their other sibling. Sure, that world might be ideal, but I don’t think it would be realistic. My sister and I now have an excellent relationship and we look back to some of the things that happen and can agree that they were instances of kids being kids. Maybe I am wrong about that. It just seems like that is what happens.

Staten Island Ferry, David Weinstone- This song got downloaded when I made a CD for someone who was moving to NY. I tried to include songs about all the boroughs. I never listen to this song and don’t have any other music by this artist. I maybe should because this song is ADORABLE.

Se A Cabo, Santana- Every time my students want to listen to my iPod (and I let them in my office) they ask me if Santana is Juelz Santana who raps some mostly horrible crap. I then hang my head in sadness.

Lag Time, Ani DiFranco- The guitar in this song is amazing. I wish I could attach it to the post and, even though I probably could, I don’t know how to and I don’t care enough to try.