I have always appreciated the power of meditation. I’m not a serious practitioner and certainly don’t know the ins and outs of “proper techniques” but I do feel that it is something that can bring people a sense of peace and enlightenment. For me, it is something to do instead of punching a wall, yelling uncontrollably, or spending copious amounts of money that I don’t have. Sometimes I know that you need to breathe, do some serious introspection, and try to become aware of yourself.
Because of these reasons, it is with great joy that I want to share the word about Invincible Donovan University set to open in Scotland. Invincible is the brainchild of two exceedingly awesome individuals, Donovan and David Lynch. According to an article in The Scotsman, “Students in the college will study education, health, economics and music and arts, along with ‘total knowledge’ and the ‘unified field’. It will promote national ‘invincibility’ and world peace.” How incredibly awesome is that. Not only will the students be getting relevant educations on basic Liberal Arts topics but they will also become invincible. Where was this school when I went to college? You are different so are we my ass. I want enlightened invincibility and world peace. Sure it isn’t built yet and doesn’t have accreditation but it is just a matter of time until that happens.
"For a country the size of Scotland it would take only 250 students meditating to protect Scotland from its enemies and to bring peace, to stop violence and drug abuse," Lynch said. "That is just a byproduct of the students meditating together." I wonder how many people we need meditating around the world to bring about the salvation of us all. Do I think it will truly work to the level that Lynch and Donovan claim? Probably not, but I don’t think it would hurt anything either. I think it is a really beautiful wonderful idea.
1. My dick costs a late night fee/ Your dick got the HIV/ My dick plays on the double feature screen/ Your dick went straight to DVD. My Dick, Mickey Avalon
2. Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Trippin’ over rails and fences/ Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Made of the mist in the abyss. Slippin Through The Sensors. Fruit Bats
3. I feel unhappy/ I feel so sad/ I’ve lost the best friend/ That I ever had. Changes, Black Sabbath
4. I really know how it feels to be/ Stressed out stressed out/ when you’re face to face with your adversity. Stressed Out, Tribe Called Quest
5. Sucking on my titties like you wanted me calling me/ all the time like Blondie/ Check out my chrissy behind it's fine. Fuck The Pain Away, Peaches
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Friday, October 26, 2007
SOMEDAY...
Most mornings as I leave for work Tony sleepily opens his eyes and says something nice to me like, “I’ll miss you,” or “I love you,” something like that and I’ll say something nice back to him. This morning was no different except, after all the normal things he said something else, “Someday…” I asked him, “Someday what” and he sleepily replied, “Someday we can all be greasers.”
Someday we can all be greasers. As I left the room I wondered what kind of strange dream he was having and laughed to myself at the implications of that statement. What if it were true? What kind of world would greaser world be? Would it be somewhere I would want to live? Would I even know if I wanted to live there or not because it would just be the norm? Questions abounded so I just decided to go with it. What steps would we have to take to make this happen and would society be better as a result of the shift?
Step 1. Fashion
Leather will make a serious comeback. Not that I’m saying leather has ever truly gone out of style, it has always been around in some shape or form but the waist length leather jacket is generally only seen as acceptable in certain circles. It will become the “it” item. The leather pant will become acceptable everyday wear for all people, not just rock stars and prostitutes. The shiner the leather the more prestige it will have. Every male will rock a white-t. They won’t be hip-hop anymore. The size of the t-shirts will be regulated and no XXLs will be sold to people who are normal sized. Greasers don’t do baggy. Women are welcome to leather but will be encouraged to wear brightly colored Capri pants or knee-length pencil skirts. Sweaters, both long and short sleeved, will be the rage but are not to hit lower than the top of the hip, it will be acceptable to tuck them in. The bullet bra will be back in full force. The pointier the boobs are the hotter the woman will be. As far as hair goes, it is obvious we are talking grease and combs handy at all times. Neither men nor women will be exempt from this rule although the ladies will no be required to appear as if they have just com from the shower.
Step 2. Vehicles
The SUV will become completely obsolete and the muscle car will return with a vengeance. Motorcycle sales will skyrocket and every young lady who is anyone at all will ride a Vespa that matches their sweater or scarf. The sedan will be seen as the lamest of all lame vehicles. Trucks of the pick-up variety will be acceptable.
Step 3. Attitude
Smoking will no longer be banned in public places. In fact, it will be encouraged as will general loitering. Slang will be the norm because you can’t be cool and talk like a square. Rumbles will be acceptable as a last resort for settling arguments but not with heavy weaponry because only a chicken pulls a gun in a rumble. Real men fight with knives, chains, bats, and tire irons. People will be respected for their level of cool not their level of success in the traditional sense. Greasers will still want the global economy to run smoothly. Not to say that people won’t have the same jobs we do today but the pay scales for some professions will shift dramatically. The expert mechanic will be one of the highest paid professionals in the world.
So, would I enjoy life as a greaser? Is this the way that the world should head in order to solve our problems of war, greed, hate, and inequity? I admit that parts of it sound ok. Nukes would be out of the question, there is nothing greaser about killing people from hundreds of miles away. But rampant leather and smoking only promises more anger and general grossness among the population at large. I’ve always wanted a Vespa and there is something about those bullet bras that make sweaters look great. Even so, I like a variety of people. I know there are many styles of greasers and I haven’t even touched on so many aspects of greaser culture here but I think I might prefer more widespread tastes. I suppose that I’ll have to disagree with Tony. Someday, we can’t all be greasers. It just wouldn’t work.
1. My dick costs a late night fee/ Your dick got the HIV/ My dick plays on the double feature screen/ Your dick went straight to DVD.
2. Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Trippin’ over rails and fences/ Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Made of the mist in the abyss.
3. I feel unhappy/ I feel so sad/ I’ve lost the best friend/ That I ever had.
4. I really know how it feels to be/ Stressed out stressed out/ when you’re face to face with your adversity
5. Sucking on my titties like you wanted me calling me/ all the time like Blondie/ Check out my chrissy behind it's fine
Someday we can all be greasers. As I left the room I wondered what kind of strange dream he was having and laughed to myself at the implications of that statement. What if it were true? What kind of world would greaser world be? Would it be somewhere I would want to live? Would I even know if I wanted to live there or not because it would just be the norm? Questions abounded so I just decided to go with it. What steps would we have to take to make this happen and would society be better as a result of the shift?
Step 1. Fashion
Leather will make a serious comeback. Not that I’m saying leather has ever truly gone out of style, it has always been around in some shape or form but the waist length leather jacket is generally only seen as acceptable in certain circles. It will become the “it” item. The leather pant will become acceptable everyday wear for all people, not just rock stars and prostitutes. The shiner the leather the more prestige it will have. Every male will rock a white-t. They won’t be hip-hop anymore. The size of the t-shirts will be regulated and no XXLs will be sold to people who are normal sized. Greasers don’t do baggy. Women are welcome to leather but will be encouraged to wear brightly colored Capri pants or knee-length pencil skirts. Sweaters, both long and short sleeved, will be the rage but are not to hit lower than the top of the hip, it will be acceptable to tuck them in. The bullet bra will be back in full force. The pointier the boobs are the hotter the woman will be. As far as hair goes, it is obvious we are talking grease and combs handy at all times. Neither men nor women will be exempt from this rule although the ladies will no be required to appear as if they have just com from the shower.
Step 2. Vehicles
The SUV will become completely obsolete and the muscle car will return with a vengeance. Motorcycle sales will skyrocket and every young lady who is anyone at all will ride a Vespa that matches their sweater or scarf. The sedan will be seen as the lamest of all lame vehicles. Trucks of the pick-up variety will be acceptable.
Step 3. Attitude
Smoking will no longer be banned in public places. In fact, it will be encouraged as will general loitering. Slang will be the norm because you can’t be cool and talk like a square. Rumbles will be acceptable as a last resort for settling arguments but not with heavy weaponry because only a chicken pulls a gun in a rumble. Real men fight with knives, chains, bats, and tire irons. People will be respected for their level of cool not their level of success in the traditional sense. Greasers will still want the global economy to run smoothly. Not to say that people won’t have the same jobs we do today but the pay scales for some professions will shift dramatically. The expert mechanic will be one of the highest paid professionals in the world.
So, would I enjoy life as a greaser? Is this the way that the world should head in order to solve our problems of war, greed, hate, and inequity? I admit that parts of it sound ok. Nukes would be out of the question, there is nothing greaser about killing people from hundreds of miles away. But rampant leather and smoking only promises more anger and general grossness among the population at large. I’ve always wanted a Vespa and there is something about those bullet bras that make sweaters look great. Even so, I like a variety of people. I know there are many styles of greasers and I haven’t even touched on so many aspects of greaser culture here but I think I might prefer more widespread tastes. I suppose that I’ll have to disagree with Tony. Someday, we can’t all be greasers. It just wouldn’t work.
1. My dick costs a late night fee/ Your dick got the HIV/ My dick plays on the double feature screen/ Your dick went straight to DVD.
2. Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Trippin’ over rails and fences/ Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Made of the mist in the abyss.
3. I feel unhappy/ I feel so sad/ I’ve lost the best friend/ That I ever had.
4. I really know how it feels to be/ Stressed out stressed out/ when you’re face to face with your adversity
5. Sucking on my titties like you wanted me calling me/ all the time like Blondie/ Check out my chrissy behind it's fine
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
A SPOOKY MEME
I found this meme over at Katrina's blog and just had to take it. I am like totally trying to get in the spirit.
1. What's the scariest movie you've ever seen?
Hands down it was the original Amityville Horror. That was easily the scariest thing ever created. It was based on a true story which made it even more terrifying. The new one was horrible, I fell asleep in the theater.
2. What was your favorite Halloween costume as a child?
Voltron, I was wicked awesome. I had a mask and a Blazing Sword that talked. I had big old shoulders made of cardboard.
3. Given enough money what would be your fantasy Halloween costume?
I really want Tony and I to go as Ernie and Bert because he is tall and I am short, I have a roundhead and he has a long one. It shouldn’t be that hard to do but since we love Ernie and Bert so much we would want it to be perfect and since I don’t have time to shop for the perfect striped sweaters or make a very very long paperclip chain I would want to hire someone to do this for us.
4. When was the last time you went trick-or-treating?
I want to say I was 14 or 15. I was far too old for it.
5. What is your favorite Halloween candy?
As far as traditional Halloween candy goes I would say candy corn. It is incredibly disgusting and tastes as if chalk were made of marshmallows but I still like it.
6. Tell us about a scary nightmare you once had.
Well the scariest are the nightmares about the Blue Meanies. If you want true horror click on the link. My first nightmare was of a HUGE monarch butterfly wearing high top turquoise Chuck Taylor’s stomping around my bed and looking at me. It sucked.
7. What is your supernatural fear?
The guy outside the window. He has a long long beard and fucked up teeth. He has wispy long falling off hair and he cackles. He looks like he spent way too long out at sea. I swear I have seen him outside my bedroom window many many times. The thing is that my bedroom is almost never on the first floor. He also doesn’t generally have a body.
8. What is your "creepy-crawly" fear?
Pede-like creatures are the worst of all creatures. You know em, those really fast centipede type creatures that can swim so you can't drown them in the toilet. Ugh.
9. Tell us about a time when you saw a ghost or heard something go bump in the night.
Other than the headless old man at the window I would have to say in the Marshall Field Music Building at SLC. It has always been said that the building is haunted. People would get trapped in practice rooms or other strange things would happen. The stories of where the ghost originated are vast and unconnected. One day I was in there with my sister and her friend Corey and I went into this dark back stairway for some reason. The door slammed shut on me (no one was around because they were on a different floor) and it wouldn’t open. It was pitch black and utterly terrifying. I pulled and pulled and pushed and twisted the knob but all in vain. Then it just swung open. Very strange.
10. Would you stay overnight in a real haunted house?
I might say that I would but if something real fucked happened I would be out the door.
11. Are you a traditionalist or a creative carver of your Jack-O'Lantern?
I haven’t carved a pumpkin in a really long time but I like to think that I would do something creative. Then again, I would probably try but not be happy with it and then just cut some triangles for eyes and a crooked mouth to cover up my errors.
12. How much do you decorate your house at Halloween?
None. That is for people with kids.
13. What do you want on your tombstone?
I don’t really expect to have one because I am going to live forever.
1. My dick costs a late night fee/ Your dick got the HIV/ My dick plays on the double feature screen/ Your dick went straight to DVD.
2. Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Trippin’ over rails and fences/ Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Made of the mist in the abyss.
3. I feel unhappy/ I feel so sad/ I’ve lost the best friend/ That I ever had.
4. I really know how it feels to be/ Stressed out stressed out/ when you’re face to face with your adversity
5. Sucking on my titties like you wanted me calling me/ all the time like Blondie/ Check out my chrissy behind it's fine
1. What's the scariest movie you've ever seen?
Hands down it was the original Amityville Horror. That was easily the scariest thing ever created. It was based on a true story which made it even more terrifying. The new one was horrible, I fell asleep in the theater.
2. What was your favorite Halloween costume as a child?
Voltron, I was wicked awesome. I had a mask and a Blazing Sword that talked. I had big old shoulders made of cardboard.
3. Given enough money what would be your fantasy Halloween costume?
I really want Tony and I to go as Ernie and Bert because he is tall and I am short, I have a roundhead and he has a long one. It shouldn’t be that hard to do but since we love Ernie and Bert so much we would want it to be perfect and since I don’t have time to shop for the perfect striped sweaters or make a very very long paperclip chain I would want to hire someone to do this for us.
4. When was the last time you went trick-or-treating?
I want to say I was 14 or 15. I was far too old for it.
5. What is your favorite Halloween candy?
As far as traditional Halloween candy goes I would say candy corn. It is incredibly disgusting and tastes as if chalk were made of marshmallows but I still like it.
6. Tell us about a scary nightmare you once had.
Well the scariest are the nightmares about the Blue Meanies. If you want true horror click on the link. My first nightmare was of a HUGE monarch butterfly wearing high top turquoise Chuck Taylor’s stomping around my bed and looking at me. It sucked.
7. What is your supernatural fear?
The guy outside the window. He has a long long beard and fucked up teeth. He has wispy long falling off hair and he cackles. He looks like he spent way too long out at sea. I swear I have seen him outside my bedroom window many many times. The thing is that my bedroom is almost never on the first floor. He also doesn’t generally have a body.
8. What is your "creepy-crawly" fear?
Pede-like creatures are the worst of all creatures. You know em, those really fast centipede type creatures that can swim so you can't drown them in the toilet. Ugh.
9. Tell us about a time when you saw a ghost or heard something go bump in the night.
Other than the headless old man at the window I would have to say in the Marshall Field Music Building at SLC. It has always been said that the building is haunted. People would get trapped in practice rooms or other strange things would happen. The stories of where the ghost originated are vast and unconnected. One day I was in there with my sister and her friend Corey and I went into this dark back stairway for some reason. The door slammed shut on me (no one was around because they were on a different floor) and it wouldn’t open. It was pitch black and utterly terrifying. I pulled and pulled and pushed and twisted the knob but all in vain. Then it just swung open. Very strange.
10. Would you stay overnight in a real haunted house?
I might say that I would but if something real fucked happened I would be out the door.
11. Are you a traditionalist or a creative carver of your Jack-O'Lantern?
I haven’t carved a pumpkin in a really long time but I like to think that I would do something creative. Then again, I would probably try but not be happy with it and then just cut some triangles for eyes and a crooked mouth to cover up my errors.
12. How much do you decorate your house at Halloween?
None. That is for people with kids.
13. What do you want on your tombstone?
I don’t really expect to have one because I am going to live forever.
1. My dick costs a late night fee/ Your dick got the HIV/ My dick plays on the double feature screen/ Your dick went straight to DVD.
2. Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Trippin’ over rails and fences/ Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Made of the mist in the abyss.
3. I feel unhappy/ I feel so sad/ I’ve lost the best friend/ That I ever had.
4. I really know how it feels to be/ Stressed out stressed out/ when you’re face to face with your adversity
5. Sucking on my titties like you wanted me calling me/ all the time like Blondie/ Check out my chrissy behind it's fine
Monday, October 22, 2007
MANIC MONDAY: FROST
It has been a long time since I have done a Manic Monday. Visit Mo to see other Manic Monday participants. I keep meaning to but then I keep forgetting or have something else to talk about. Today I want to talk about this word. Frosty.
There are many things that are frosty; Frosties, Frost, Ice, Windows, Bitches, etc. However, there is one type of frost that surpasses all and that is the sheet of frost on the outside of a proper Jell-O Pudding Pop. Once you have dispatched with the frosty ice sheet the pop will then bend in a luscious and wonderful way. Unfortunately, these pops are no longer available. The Jell-O pops of today are all wrong. They are the wrong shape, the wrong taste, and they have no frosty ice sheet. They are a true disappointment.
However, all is not lost. There is a frosty ice sheet to be had. It exists on a fruit pop instead of a pudding pop but that is ok. It will do. I’m, talking about Breyers all fruit bars. MMMMM delicious. They are also shaped like the pudding pop so that makes them even more perfect. I have eaten the Strawberry flavor so it is really the only one I can completely vouch for but I have a feeling that all flavors will suffice. Under the frosty ice sheet the pops bend in a Jell-O-like way as well. These pops are excellent. They are also incredibly low in calories and sugars. You can’t beat that.
I really want to try the Swirl variety pack. Man those flavors sound fantastic; Blueberry Lemon, Strawberry Blueberry, Strawberry lemon, and Strawberry Orange. Plus, the swirl pudding pop was always my favorite. I feel really sad for Monica because I know how much she loves pudding pops (maybe even more than I do) and most of these flavors have strawberry in them and she can’t eat Strawberry. The rest of you should eat these things. I can’t stand frosty goodness like this disappearing twice.
1. My dick costs a late night fee/ Your dick got the HIV/ My dick plays on the double feature screen/ Your dick went straight to DVD.
2. Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Trippin’ over rails and fences/ Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Made of the mist in the abyss.
3. I feel unhappy/ I feel so sad/ I’ve lost the best friend/ That I ever had.
4. I saw her today at the reception/ A glass of wine in her hand. You Can't Always Get What You Want, Rolling Stones. Identified by Phil
5. I really know how it feels to be/ Stressed out stressed out/ when you’re face to face with your adversity
There are many things that are frosty; Frosties, Frost, Ice, Windows, Bitches, etc. However, there is one type of frost that surpasses all and that is the sheet of frost on the outside of a proper Jell-O Pudding Pop. Once you have dispatched with the frosty ice sheet the pop will then bend in a luscious and wonderful way. Unfortunately, these pops are no longer available. The Jell-O pops of today are all wrong. They are the wrong shape, the wrong taste, and they have no frosty ice sheet. They are a true disappointment.
However, all is not lost. There is a frosty ice sheet to be had. It exists on a fruit pop instead of a pudding pop but that is ok. It will do. I’m, talking about Breyers all fruit bars. MMMMM delicious. They are also shaped like the pudding pop so that makes them even more perfect. I have eaten the Strawberry flavor so it is really the only one I can completely vouch for but I have a feeling that all flavors will suffice. Under the frosty ice sheet the pops bend in a Jell-O-like way as well. These pops are excellent. They are also incredibly low in calories and sugars. You can’t beat that.
I really want to try the Swirl variety pack. Man those flavors sound fantastic; Blueberry Lemon, Strawberry Blueberry, Strawberry lemon, and Strawberry Orange. Plus, the swirl pudding pop was always my favorite. I feel really sad for Monica because I know how much she loves pudding pops (maybe even more than I do) and most of these flavors have strawberry in them and she can’t eat Strawberry. The rest of you should eat these things. I can’t stand frosty goodness like this disappearing twice.
1. My dick costs a late night fee/ Your dick got the HIV/ My dick plays on the double feature screen/ Your dick went straight to DVD.
2. Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Trippin’ over rails and fences/ Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Made of the mist in the abyss.
3. I feel unhappy/ I feel so sad/ I’ve lost the best friend/ That I ever had.
4. I saw her today at the reception/ A glass of wine in her hand. You Can't Always Get What You Want, Rolling Stones. Identified by Phil
5. I really know how it feels to be/ Stressed out stressed out/ when you’re face to face with your adversity
Friday, October 19, 2007
MY WORK THERE IS DONE
My workshop graduated yesterday. I finished 14 out of 18 people for a 77% grad rate. The average is 60% so I am pretty happy to have kept most of them. One of the things I most enjoyed was having each client turn to the person next to them and say something positive. It was hard for some of them because a few didn’t really get along with the person next to them all that well. However, they were at least able to say that they wished them luck in their job search. One client turned to another and she said that she had seen a lot of growth in him, in the way he spoke and presented himself. That when he walked into class on Wednesday in his suit for his practice interview it was like looking at a whole new person. The entire class appreciated that and the smile on the young man’s face told it all.
Some of them felt they had really grown and learned a lot. Even though our program is only eight days long, there really can be a noticeable change in some of the clients. There is a change in their communication, their confidence, and in their level of hope and certainty about their futures. It is amazing to be a part of that transformation.
The first five days of workshop we spend the last hour going over five common interview questions.
Day 1- Tell me a little about yourself
Day 2- What are your greatest strengths
Day 3- What is one of your weaknesses
Day 4- Where do you see yourself in 3, 5, or 10 years
Day 5- why should I hire you
I told them that since we asked that first question I had seen a huge amount of growth and maturity in their answers and that I was proud of all of them. At that point, even the ones who felt they hadn’t changed at all seemed to acknowledge that fact. They changed from people who stumbled over their words and didn’t know how to make themselves look good into confident young men and women who knew that they had something to offer. One of the students even said they should go around and answer that first question again just to see how far they had come. The rest of the class groaned so only she answered the question but the confidence with which she did was awesome.
Sure there were some bumps in the road and I have some things I need to tighten up as far as scheduling and even teaching some of the sessions. Regardless, I feel I taught them what needed to be taught and showed them a different way of doing things. I have high hopes for them all. On Monday I get a whole new group and it starts again.
1. Imagine there’s no heaven/ It’s easy if you try/ No hell below us/ Above us only sky. Imagine. John Lennon. Identified by Monica
2. I lost my lucky ball and chain/ now she’s four years gone. She's five feet tall and sick of me/ And all my carrying on. Lucky Ball and Chain, They Might Be Giants. Identified by Monica.
3. My dick costs a late night fee/ Your dick got the HIV/ My dick plays on the double feature screen/ Your dick went straight to DVD.
4. Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Trippin’ over rails and fences/ Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Made of the mist in the abyss.
5. I feel unhappy/ I feel so sad/ I’ve lost the best friend/ That I ever had.
Some of them felt they had really grown and learned a lot. Even though our program is only eight days long, there really can be a noticeable change in some of the clients. There is a change in their communication, their confidence, and in their level of hope and certainty about their futures. It is amazing to be a part of that transformation.
The first five days of workshop we spend the last hour going over five common interview questions.
Day 1- Tell me a little about yourself
Day 2- What are your greatest strengths
Day 3- What is one of your weaknesses
Day 4- Where do you see yourself in 3, 5, or 10 years
Day 5- why should I hire you
I told them that since we asked that first question I had seen a huge amount of growth and maturity in their answers and that I was proud of all of them. At that point, even the ones who felt they hadn’t changed at all seemed to acknowledge that fact. They changed from people who stumbled over their words and didn’t know how to make themselves look good into confident young men and women who knew that they had something to offer. One of the students even said they should go around and answer that first question again just to see how far they had come. The rest of the class groaned so only she answered the question but the confidence with which she did was awesome.
Sure there were some bumps in the road and I have some things I need to tighten up as far as scheduling and even teaching some of the sessions. Regardless, I feel I taught them what needed to be taught and showed them a different way of doing things. I have high hopes for them all. On Monday I get a whole new group and it starts again.
1. Imagine there’s no heaven/ It’s easy if you try/ No hell below us/ Above us only sky. Imagine. John Lennon. Identified by Monica
2. I lost my lucky ball and chain/ now she’s four years gone. She's five feet tall and sick of me/ And all my carrying on. Lucky Ball and Chain, They Might Be Giants. Identified by Monica.
3. My dick costs a late night fee/ Your dick got the HIV/ My dick plays on the double feature screen/ Your dick went straight to DVD.
4. Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Trippin’ over rails and fences/ Slippin’ on through the sensors/ Made of the mist in the abyss.
5. I feel unhappy/ I feel so sad/ I’ve lost the best friend/ That I ever had.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
10 SNOGGABLE FICTIONAL MALES
Cassandra, Customized Training Assistant, seems to be doing well. Today we played find the files. It was not an easy game. Before we moved offices things were exactly where I expected them to be. Now, not only do I not know where files are, no one seems to know. As we have an audit coming up relatively soon and are missing a few (and I mean very few) files, this could prove to be a problem. We have some good people trying to help locate them though so it should all be ok. The Volunteer Coordinator resigned after her first day. I am really pissed. Anyway.
Blog Antagonist had this really interesting meme up a while ago about 10 literary characters that you would want to make out with. Being quite a reader, I thought that I would have no problems with this whatsoever. I actually found it to be quite hard. I could only come up with four (and that was a challenge only two were easy) so I really take no responsibility for anyone five and after. I had to push the envelope a little bit. You are all probably going to now find me a very odd individual. See, here is the thing. Most of the books I love aren’t teeming with positive male characters that I would want to make out with. In fact, many of the books that I love have pretty horrible men in them. I like books about bad people. Oh well.
1. Valentine Michael Smith, Stranger in a Strange Land
Ah, the man from Mars, a genuinely honest person who loved humanity more than anything in the universe. It was written that when he kissed or made love he was able to focus only on the person that he was with. His mind was empty of everything except experiencing that moment. It was said to be quite nice. It sounds quite nice. He understood people but didn’t understand the world in which they lived. He tried things his own way and changed people for the better. That is why he had to be my number one.
2. Howard Roark, The Fountainhead
Roark was actually the first person that I thought of but he was soon eclipsed by Mike. There is something incredibly sexy about someone who is incredibly passionate and rigid in their convictions even if those convictions sometimes make you an asshole. Roark was a sick fucker but I loved him and wish more people felt as passionately about their work as he did. Well, maybe not that passionate, but close.
3. Paul Mua’dib, Dune
Paul had powers. Really cool powers that let him lead people and guide a society. I’m not so sure I want to make out with Paul from the latter books because, if I recall correctly, he went a little bonkers but in this book he was an inspiration. He was a hero and he loved with all his heart. Wait, wasn’t he 15? Oops, I promise that I literally just remembered that while I was writing. Damn. Take my list down to three legitimate entries.
4. Switters, Fierce Invalids Home From Hot Climates.
Switters is a nutjob. He is a walking talking contradiction but he loves life and he loves women. He’s a real Indiana Jones type of guy who is appropriately reverent of other cultures. Yet, he still questions the validity of most social constructs. Plus, if he could get a nun to sleep with him he had to be offering something pretty good.
5. Pan, Jitterbug Perfume
Yes, I realize that Pan is a half-man half-goat. As you can see my list has gotten quite wonky. Pan loved the ladies and the ladies loved Pan. Sure, he smelled like a goat in heat all the time but that’s what the perfume was all about.
6. Hazel, Watership Down
Hazel is a rabbit. That is even sillier than a half-man half-goat. It doesn’t even make sense. However, if Hazel was a person, he would be right up there after Roark. Hazel was the best person a rabbit could be. He led his flock to a new home where they would be safe and thrive. He orchestrated a plan to liberate does from the clutches of an evil tyrant. He was incredibly smart and knew how to harness the strengths of those around him. He was a true leader because he knew when to follow.
7. Azlan, The Lion The Witch and the Wardrobe
Sure, Azlan is a lion and an allegory for Jesus. I’m not trying to say I want to make out with Jesus or a lion. Azlan is just freaking cool. He is magic, just, wise, and brave. He would sacrifice himself for the betterment of the world and has no problem taking a kid for a ride on his back. Azlan would make a good dad.
8. Severus Snape, Harry Potter
Yeah, the man was not the most attractive. Granted, he was an evil wizard. However, his love for a woman was stronger than his loyalty to domination and control. To make it even more impressive it was a love that was unrequited. If he could feel that strongly about a woman who didn’t even love him back he was obviously a man with a lot to offer. Or else he was a total sicko. It really could go either way.
9. Winston Smith, 1984
What could possibly be kissable about a man who would turn his one true love over to a horrible oppressive government to save himself you may ask? Well here it is; Winston Smith tried. He really really tried. For a while he even succeeded. Sometimes society will crush someone and they just aren’t strong enough to resist. Winston Smith was just a regular guy and he couldn’t beat the system but I would give him a kiss for trying.
10. Smog, The Hobbit
Smog was evil. Smog had scales. Smog was a greedy money hungry killer. He was not a nice guy. However, Smog was really into himself and sometimes a rich stuck up guy can have something inexplicable going for him. He's like a dragon Bateman. I was really grasping at straws by this point people. Give me a break.
2. I prayed to/ Heaven today/ Bring its hammer down on me/ And pound you out of my head/ I can’t think with you in there. Missing, Beck
3. I spend the afternoon in cars/ I sit in traffic jams for hours/ Don’t push me I am not ok. Jumpers, Sleater Kinney
5. So they say I was sometimes cruel/ I don’t know if I would say that too/ Oh I/ I don’t know about that. Sixteen, Le Tigre
Blog Antagonist had this really interesting meme up a while ago about 10 literary characters that you would want to make out with. Being quite a reader, I thought that I would have no problems with this whatsoever. I actually found it to be quite hard. I could only come up with four (and that was a challenge only two were easy) so I really take no responsibility for anyone five and after. I had to push the envelope a little bit. You are all probably going to now find me a very odd individual. See, here is the thing. Most of the books I love aren’t teeming with positive male characters that I would want to make out with. In fact, many of the books that I love have pretty horrible men in them. I like books about bad people. Oh well.
1. Valentine Michael Smith, Stranger in a Strange Land
Ah, the man from Mars, a genuinely honest person who loved humanity more than anything in the universe. It was written that when he kissed or made love he was able to focus only on the person that he was with. His mind was empty of everything except experiencing that moment. It was said to be quite nice. It sounds quite nice. He understood people but didn’t understand the world in which they lived. He tried things his own way and changed people for the better. That is why he had to be my number one.
2. Howard Roark, The Fountainhead
Roark was actually the first person that I thought of but he was soon eclipsed by Mike. There is something incredibly sexy about someone who is incredibly passionate and rigid in their convictions even if those convictions sometimes make you an asshole. Roark was a sick fucker but I loved him and wish more people felt as passionately about their work as he did. Well, maybe not that passionate, but close.
3. Paul Mua’dib, Dune
Paul had powers. Really cool powers that let him lead people and guide a society. I’m not so sure I want to make out with Paul from the latter books because, if I recall correctly, he went a little bonkers but in this book he was an inspiration. He was a hero and he loved with all his heart. Wait, wasn’t he 15? Oops, I promise that I literally just remembered that while I was writing. Damn. Take my list down to three legitimate entries.
4. Switters, Fierce Invalids Home From Hot Climates.
Switters is a nutjob. He is a walking talking contradiction but he loves life and he loves women. He’s a real Indiana Jones type of guy who is appropriately reverent of other cultures. Yet, he still questions the validity of most social constructs. Plus, if he could get a nun to sleep with him he had to be offering something pretty good.
5. Pan, Jitterbug Perfume
Yes, I realize that Pan is a half-man half-goat. As you can see my list has gotten quite wonky. Pan loved the ladies and the ladies loved Pan. Sure, he smelled like a goat in heat all the time but that’s what the perfume was all about.
6. Hazel, Watership Down
Hazel is a rabbit. That is even sillier than a half-man half-goat. It doesn’t even make sense. However, if Hazel was a person, he would be right up there after Roark. Hazel was the best person a rabbit could be. He led his flock to a new home where they would be safe and thrive. He orchestrated a plan to liberate does from the clutches of an evil tyrant. He was incredibly smart and knew how to harness the strengths of those around him. He was a true leader because he knew when to follow.
7. Azlan, The Lion The Witch and the Wardrobe
Sure, Azlan is a lion and an allegory for Jesus. I’m not trying to say I want to make out with Jesus or a lion. Azlan is just freaking cool. He is magic, just, wise, and brave. He would sacrifice himself for the betterment of the world and has no problem taking a kid for a ride on his back. Azlan would make a good dad.
8. Severus Snape, Harry Potter
Yeah, the man was not the most attractive. Granted, he was an evil wizard. However, his love for a woman was stronger than his loyalty to domination and control. To make it even more impressive it was a love that was unrequited. If he could feel that strongly about a woman who didn’t even love him back he was obviously a man with a lot to offer. Or else he was a total sicko. It really could go either way.
9. Winston Smith, 1984
What could possibly be kissable about a man who would turn his one true love over to a horrible oppressive government to save himself you may ask? Well here it is; Winston Smith tried. He really really tried. For a while he even succeeded. Sometimes society will crush someone and they just aren’t strong enough to resist. Winston Smith was just a regular guy and he couldn’t beat the system but I would give him a kiss for trying.
10. Smog, The Hobbit
Smog was evil. Smog had scales. Smog was a greedy money hungry killer. He was not a nice guy. However, Smog was really into himself and sometimes a rich stuck up guy can have something inexplicable going for him. He's like a dragon Bateman. I was really grasping at straws by this point people. Give me a break.
2. I prayed to/ Heaven today/ Bring its hammer down on me/ And pound you out of my head/ I can’t think with you in there. Missing, Beck
3. I spend the afternoon in cars/ I sit in traffic jams for hours/ Don’t push me I am not ok. Jumpers, Sleater Kinney
5. So they say I was sometimes cruel/ I don’t know if I would say that too/ Oh I/ I don’t know about that. Sixteen, Le Tigre
Friday, October 12, 2007
FOODIE FRIDAY: SOUP AND SALAD
I made this dish on Wednesday and it was totally yummy. I haven’t made soup in ages although I used to have this awesome lentil and potato soup recipe that has disappeared along with the recipe notebook I had in college. It is too bad, that thing was great. It disappeared sometime at Addison apartment. I am not sure when but one day I went to grab it and the thing was gone.
Anyway, I made a new soup and it was pretty easy to make. The only difficult part was straining it and I am sure there are gadgets out there much better than my mesh colander for straining soup. Or maybe not and it is just a pain to do. If I had a bowl the same size as the colander it would have been much easier. The soup will serve 3-4 while the salad will serve 2
Pear and Goat Cheese Salad with pesto vinaigrette
-4cups salad greens of your choosing, ideally something with a little bitterness
-1 pear halved and cored
-2tbsp herbed goat cheese (or regular if you like)
-2tbsp slivered almonds (I made more than needed because they taste good)
-8 radishes sliced into thin rounds
-Tsp garlic powder
-Salt and pepper to taste
Dressing
-1tbsp pesto
-3tbsp balsamic vinegar
-Preheat oven to 350
-Place almonds on a baking sheet and dust with spices
-Toast for 7 min (give or take) stirring occasionally
-Put 1tbsp goat cheese in the cored out section of the pears
-Place stuffed pear in center of 2 cups of salad greens
-Sprinkle radishes and 1tbsp almonds over salad
-Dress lightly with the pesto vinaigrette
Potato, leek, and cauliflower soup with asparagus and thyme
-4 spears asparagus chopped into bite sized rounds
-½ head cauliflower chopped but not all that fine
-1 potato peeled and sliced
-2 medium leeks sliced into thin rounds (only the white and light green parts)
-2tbsp butter
-3.5cups vegetable broth
-2 cloves garlic pressed
-10 small sprigs fresh thyme
-Salt and pepper to taste
-2tbsp freshly grated parmesan cheese
-½ cup room temperature nonfat yogurt
-4 pieces thinly (1/2in) sliced ciabatta bread
-Put 1.5tbsp butter in a soup pot and melt
-Sauté leeks about 2 min
-Add garlic and sauté 1min
-Add cauliflower, potato, 6 sprigs thyme, and a dash each of salt and pepper and sauté 5 min
-Remove sprigs of thyme and discard
-Add vegetable broth and simmer 20 min or until cauliflower and potato are soft
-Pour mixture into a blender or food processor and liquefy
-Pour blended soup through a thin colander to strain out most of the pulp. It will take a while if you have a colander that fits nicely over the top of a big bowl it will be nice and easy
-Heat oven to 350
-Rub bread in the seasonings left in the baking sheet from the almonds and then cover one side with parmesan
-Bake 5-8 min until crisp and cheese is melted and browned
-Put the rest of the butter into the pan and melt
-Sauté asparagus rounds until slightly soft but still keep a nice crispness about 7 min
-Once the soup is strained add the yogurt and whisk until smooth
-Add asparagus rounds
-If needed heat over med-low heat but do not bring to a boil
-Garnish with 2 slices of ciabatta bread and the remaining thyme sprigs
Enjoy
1. If this world were mine/ I would place at your feet/ all that I own/ You’ve been so good to me. If This World Were Mine, Luthur. Identified by Urban Chick
2. I prayed to/ Heaven today/ Bring its hammer down on me/ And pound you out of my head/ I can’t think with you in there
3. I spend the afternoon in cars/ I sit in traffic jams for hours/ Don’t push me I am not ok
4. Pistol shots/ Gun shots/ pistol shots/ Gun shots/ Bullets from a revolver/ bullets from a gun/ Bullets through the atmosphere/ here they come. Sapphire Bullets of Pure Love, TheyMight Be Giants. Identified by, Monica
5. So they say I was sometimes cruel/ I don’t know if I would say that too/ Oh I/ I don’t know about that
Anyway, I made a new soup and it was pretty easy to make. The only difficult part was straining it and I am sure there are gadgets out there much better than my mesh colander for straining soup. Or maybe not and it is just a pain to do. If I had a bowl the same size as the colander it would have been much easier. The soup will serve 3-4 while the salad will serve 2
Pear and Goat Cheese Salad with pesto vinaigrette
-4cups salad greens of your choosing, ideally something with a little bitterness
-1 pear halved and cored
-2tbsp herbed goat cheese (or regular if you like)
-2tbsp slivered almonds (I made more than needed because they taste good)
-8 radishes sliced into thin rounds
-Tsp garlic powder
-Salt and pepper to taste
Dressing
-1tbsp pesto
-3tbsp balsamic vinegar
-Preheat oven to 350
-Place almonds on a baking sheet and dust with spices
-Toast for 7 min (give or take) stirring occasionally
-Put 1tbsp goat cheese in the cored out section of the pears
-Place stuffed pear in center of 2 cups of salad greens
-Sprinkle radishes and 1tbsp almonds over salad
-Dress lightly with the pesto vinaigrette
Potato, leek, and cauliflower soup with asparagus and thyme
-4 spears asparagus chopped into bite sized rounds
-½ head cauliflower chopped but not all that fine
-1 potato peeled and sliced
-2 medium leeks sliced into thin rounds (only the white and light green parts)
-2tbsp butter
-3.5cups vegetable broth
-2 cloves garlic pressed
-10 small sprigs fresh thyme
-Salt and pepper to taste
-2tbsp freshly grated parmesan cheese
-½ cup room temperature nonfat yogurt
-4 pieces thinly (1/2in) sliced ciabatta bread
-Put 1.5tbsp butter in a soup pot and melt
-Sauté leeks about 2 min
-Add garlic and sauté 1min
-Add cauliflower, potato, 6 sprigs thyme, and a dash each of salt and pepper and sauté 5 min
-Remove sprigs of thyme and discard
-Add vegetable broth and simmer 20 min or until cauliflower and potato are soft
-Pour mixture into a blender or food processor and liquefy
-Pour blended soup through a thin colander to strain out most of the pulp. It will take a while if you have a colander that fits nicely over the top of a big bowl it will be nice and easy
-Heat oven to 350
-Rub bread in the seasonings left in the baking sheet from the almonds and then cover one side with parmesan
-Bake 5-8 min until crisp and cheese is melted and browned
-Put the rest of the butter into the pan and melt
-Sauté asparagus rounds until slightly soft but still keep a nice crispness about 7 min
-Once the soup is strained add the yogurt and whisk until smooth
-Add asparagus rounds
-If needed heat over med-low heat but do not bring to a boil
-Garnish with 2 slices of ciabatta bread and the remaining thyme sprigs
Enjoy
1. If this world were mine/ I would place at your feet/ all that I own/ You’ve been so good to me. If This World Were Mine, Luthur. Identified by Urban Chick
2. I prayed to/ Heaven today/ Bring its hammer down on me/ And pound you out of my head/ I can’t think with you in there
3. I spend the afternoon in cars/ I sit in traffic jams for hours/ Don’t push me I am not ok
4. Pistol shots/ Gun shots/ pistol shots/ Gun shots/ Bullets from a revolver/ bullets from a gun/ Bullets through the atmosphere/ here they come. Sapphire Bullets of Pure Love, TheyMight Be Giants. Identified by, Monica
5. So they say I was sometimes cruel/ I don’t know if I would say that too/ Oh I/ I don’t know about that
Thursday, October 11, 2007
HAPPY BIRTHDAY HEAD
I write about a lot of things on this blog but have noticed that in the 252 posts I have only mentioned my sister, Shoshana, in seven of them. I find that to be very odd. Maybe it is because I am so protective of her that I don’t want to put Shoshana stuff out there for everyone to see. Maybe it is just because when we talk it is often in code and doesn’t make sense to other people. Either way, I think today is a good time to talk about her because today she is one quarter of a century old.
I remember running down the hall when she was being born. I remember holding her afterward and just being amazed at how much she was like me. I don’t remember the actual birth, it was probably too gross to remember or maybe I wasn’t in the room for that part.
She was a horrible baby. She was huge and mean and would push me off our mother’s lap when we were both trying to sit on it. I still loved her though. She got better as she got older, more fun to play with and easier to push back. You can’t go around pushing a baby when you are three. It’s just not right. She had this impish quality to her face and her eyes were always twinkling with mischievous intent. That quality hasn’t entirely left her. There is nothing quite as worrisome as Shoshana with a glint in her eye and a cackle on her lips. It means she will probably want me to do something. Or else that she just farted. She loves farting and general crass behavior but I don’t think she realizes that most people don’t. A weird one is that Shoshana.
She is the only extrovert in a family of introverts and sometimes that makes her incredibly annoying. She has these urges to go out and do things and has the energy of a ten year old. I would rather sit on my ass most of the time. I will say, however, that when I go to visit her she brings out the doer in me and when she comes to visit me I bring out the sitting on the couch and watching TV in her.
Some of my favorite Shoshana memories were while we were on summer vacations. We would watch MTV and The Box for hours and hours. We would play games and run around the yard. I would cook burritos for us for lunch. I would try desperately to make home friend potatoes but didn’t quite understand how long a potato had to cook and over what heat. I always made her eat what I made. I got better. Those were the days. There were also the days years later when I would come home form college and pass out in bed only to awaken to her snuggled up next to me. It creeped me out and I wanted to kick her but Shoshana has never been one to go light on the affection and I knew she just missed me.
We were always very close, even when fighting. We could always count on each other for some good game playing or Lego building. If I wanted to play Lego tomorrow she would be the first one I would think of. Unfortunately, she lives across the country and I don’t get the chance very often.
For her age, Shoshana has done quite a bit. I usually don’t think of her achievements as all that special because she’s my stupid little sister and so what. She has taught High School, worked as a community organizer, designed a new High School that opened in The Bronx, and most recently up and moved to LA to join Americorp and work with Habitat for Humanity. She’s made a difference to so many people in her life and is working on influencing more. She may even become a firefighter. I still can’t keep a straight face when I think of that prospect but if it is what she really wants I am sure she will make it happen. That’s the kind of kid she is. I’m proud of her. Even though I rarely say it I hope she always knows.
1. If this world were mine/ I would place at your feet/ all that I own/ You’ve been so good to me
2. I prayed to/ Heaven today/ Bring its hammer down on me/ And pound you out of my head/ I can’t think with you in there
3. I spend the afternoon in cars/ I sit in traffic jams for hours/ Don’t push me I am not ok
4. Fish heads/ Fish Heads/ Rolly polly fish heads/ Eat them up yum. Fishheads, Barnes and Barnes. Identified by Johnny Yen.
5. I am intrinsically no good/ I have a heart that’s made of wood/ And I am only biding time/ Only reciting memorized lines. The Hem Of Your Garment, Cake. Identified by Brooke.
I remember running down the hall when she was being born. I remember holding her afterward and just being amazed at how much she was like me. I don’t remember the actual birth, it was probably too gross to remember or maybe I wasn’t in the room for that part.
She was a horrible baby. She was huge and mean and would push me off our mother’s lap when we were both trying to sit on it. I still loved her though. She got better as she got older, more fun to play with and easier to push back. You can’t go around pushing a baby when you are three. It’s just not right. She had this impish quality to her face and her eyes were always twinkling with mischievous intent. That quality hasn’t entirely left her. There is nothing quite as worrisome as Shoshana with a glint in her eye and a cackle on her lips. It means she will probably want me to do something. Or else that she just farted. She loves farting and general crass behavior but I don’t think she realizes that most people don’t. A weird one is that Shoshana.
She is the only extrovert in a family of introverts and sometimes that makes her incredibly annoying. She has these urges to go out and do things and has the energy of a ten year old. I would rather sit on my ass most of the time. I will say, however, that when I go to visit her she brings out the doer in me and when she comes to visit me I bring out the sitting on the couch and watching TV in her.
Some of my favorite Shoshana memories were while we were on summer vacations. We would watch MTV and The Box for hours and hours. We would play games and run around the yard. I would cook burritos for us for lunch. I would try desperately to make home friend potatoes but didn’t quite understand how long a potato had to cook and over what heat. I always made her eat what I made. I got better. Those were the days. There were also the days years later when I would come home form college and pass out in bed only to awaken to her snuggled up next to me. It creeped me out and I wanted to kick her but Shoshana has never been one to go light on the affection and I knew she just missed me.
We were always very close, even when fighting. We could always count on each other for some good game playing or Lego building. If I wanted to play Lego tomorrow she would be the first one I would think of. Unfortunately, she lives across the country and I don’t get the chance very often.
For her age, Shoshana has done quite a bit. I usually don’t think of her achievements as all that special because she’s my stupid little sister and so what. She has taught High School, worked as a community organizer, designed a new High School that opened in The Bronx, and most recently up and moved to LA to join Americorp and work with Habitat for Humanity. She’s made a difference to so many people in her life and is working on influencing more. She may even become a firefighter. I still can’t keep a straight face when I think of that prospect but if it is what she really wants I am sure she will make it happen. That’s the kind of kid she is. I’m proud of her. Even though I rarely say it I hope she always knows.
1. If this world were mine/ I would place at your feet/ all that I own/ You’ve been so good to me
2. I prayed to/ Heaven today/ Bring its hammer down on me/ And pound you out of my head/ I can’t think with you in there
3. I spend the afternoon in cars/ I sit in traffic jams for hours/ Don’t push me I am not ok
4. Fish heads/ Fish Heads/ Rolly polly fish heads/ Eat them up yum. Fishheads, Barnes and Barnes. Identified by Johnny Yen.
5. I am intrinsically no good/ I have a heart that’s made of wood/ And I am only biding time/ Only reciting memorized lines. The Hem Of Your Garment, Cake. Identified by Brooke.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
A GOOD WEEK SO FAR
Yesterday I got the chance to do two new things at work. The first was to being my 8-day pre-employment workshop. Even though I am only on day 1.5 of 8 I think it is going quite smoothly and I don’t have anything to worry about. Not even the fact that my career counselor (who teaches much of the workshop with me) will be out of the office next week. I’m not quite sure why she needed to b out during my first class but so it goes. I’m fine with it. The second thing was to offer someone a job. I have told clients that they have been offered jobs before but it isn’t the same at all. This is someone whose resume I reviewed, who I called in for her interview, and who I got to make the hiring decision about. She starts tomorrow! I am so excited. Finally I can get some help around here.
To make things even better they are hiring a volunteer coordinator so I will never *fingers crossed* have to do that stupid job anymore. The candidate that I almost hired for my training assistant position ended up interviewing for that and they are going to offer her the position, unless they already did. The only bummer about that is that it isn’t someone else I had recommended who didn’t get hired because of some stupid stuff but there isn’t anything I can do about that. At least I feel a little better about not offering her the assistant position. I really liked her.
Tomorrow my little sister, Shoshana, will be twenty-five. What a grown-up age. I can hardly believe it. It makes me feel a little old, but not as old as being at that Of Montreal show did so it will be okay.
As I am in a very happy mood I think I will include a youtube clip that made me very happy last night. I was searching for live clips of Of Montreal doing songs I want them to play and but they never will I came across this video that a couple of random dudes made to the ever so wonderful, Tim Wish You Were Born A Girl. It’s less than two minutes long so none of you have any excuse but to watch and see how incredibly adorable and wonderful and sweet this song is. Then, if you are feeling extra happy (which you should be after that song), check out the Hiemdalsgate Like a Promethean Curse video because who doesn’t like a great song with a video that looks as it if cost $10 and makes no sense? I won't be mad it you don't because even though it is under four minutes that is almost twice as long as the first. One of these days I promise I will stop obsessing over this band that no one knows about. I will. Really. I mean it. Random songs are after the videos.
1. If this world were mine/ I would place at your feet/ all that I own/ You’ve been so good to me
2. Oh it’s good/ Good to see you again/ Good to meet your girlfriend/ I’ll try not to wonder where you are/ when you go outside to kiss her in the front seat of your car. Good, Bad, Ugly. Ani DiFranco. Identified by Brooke.
3. I prayed to/ Heaven today/ Bring its hammer down on me/ And pound you out of my head/ I can’t think with you in there
4. Lately I find myself out gazing at stars/ Hearing guitars/ Like someone in love. Like Someone in Love, Bjork. Identified by Brooke.
5. I spend the afternoon in cars/ I sit in traffic jams for hours/ Don’t push me I am not ok
To make things even better they are hiring a volunteer coordinator so I will never *fingers crossed* have to do that stupid job anymore. The candidate that I almost hired for my training assistant position ended up interviewing for that and they are going to offer her the position, unless they already did. The only bummer about that is that it isn’t someone else I had recommended who didn’t get hired because of some stupid stuff but there isn’t anything I can do about that. At least I feel a little better about not offering her the assistant position. I really liked her.
Tomorrow my little sister, Shoshana, will be twenty-five. What a grown-up age. I can hardly believe it. It makes me feel a little old, but not as old as being at that Of Montreal show did so it will be okay.
As I am in a very happy mood I think I will include a youtube clip that made me very happy last night. I was searching for live clips of Of Montreal doing songs I want them to play and but they never will I came across this video that a couple of random dudes made to the ever so wonderful, Tim Wish You Were Born A Girl. It’s less than two minutes long so none of you have any excuse but to watch and see how incredibly adorable and wonderful and sweet this song is. Then, if you are feeling extra happy (which you should be after that song), check out the Hiemdalsgate Like a Promethean Curse video because who doesn’t like a great song with a video that looks as it if cost $10 and makes no sense? I won't be mad it you don't because even though it is under four minutes that is almost twice as long as the first. One of these days I promise I will stop obsessing over this band that no one knows about. I will. Really. I mean it. Random songs are after the videos.
1. If this world were mine/ I would place at your feet/ all that I own/ You’ve been so good to me
2. Oh it’s good/ Good to see you again/ Good to meet your girlfriend/ I’ll try not to wonder where you are/ when you go outside to kiss her in the front seat of your car. Good, Bad, Ugly. Ani DiFranco. Identified by Brooke.
3. I prayed to/ Heaven today/ Bring its hammer down on me/ And pound you out of my head/ I can’t think with you in there
4. Lately I find myself out gazing at stars/ Hearing guitars/ Like someone in love. Like Someone in Love, Bjork. Identified by Brooke.
5. I spend the afternoon in cars/ I sit in traffic jams for hours/ Don’t push me I am not ok
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
THE BEST SHOW I ALMOST NEVER SAW
This past Sunday Monica and I went to an incredibly fantastic concert. We thought it was an Of Montreal concert, which it was, but it was also an MGMT and Grand Buffet concert. For some reason the opening acts were not listed anywhere. We had debated going to the show for some time. We initially planned to go when the tickets went on sale. After we got online and went to order them we were horrified by the $14 increase in price by using Ticketmaster (they were $19 tickets) and didn’t click buy. We then planned to go to the box office but then didn’t. Since we had just seen Of Montreal at Pitchfork we thought it might be okay if we missed the show. Seeing as they played almost exclusively from their new album (Hissing Fauna, Are You The Destroyer?) at Pitchfork, we didn’t want to go see the same show, even though we like that album much better now than we had at the time. Friday after work we decided to get tickets. Since it was their show and not a festival it would have to be longer and therefore they couldn’t only play songs from the new album because they would have more time. It made sense.
As we walked up to The Metro and looked at the people standing in line I got a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. I didn’t just feel old, I felt really old. Damn these all ages shows! I saw at least three people who brought their mothers because they weren’t old enough to go to the big city by themselves to see a show. The average age couldn’t have been over twenty and it may have been younger. We considered not standing in line with the youth but then got over ourselves and stood. When we got inside we went up to the front of the stage and ended up talking to some kids. They were really excited that we had been at Pitchfork. We were slightly uncomfortable both with their youth and the tight proximity of folks and noticed that the balcony was mostly clear and would provide an awesome view. We decided to be more comfortable and let the kids have their fun.
MGMT was real okay. I liked one of their songs. There were plenty of fans there who liked many of their songs. I was confused. I attributed it to my age and let it go. Grand Buffet was next. When I saw a large man that looked very much like Jay McCaroll of Project Runway fame wearing a cape made out of a towel I knew this band was going to be awesome. His bandmate was a skinny man who looked surprisingly like Satan, but a nice Satan. They were utterly awesome. Their banter was hilarious and they made a lot of fun of Of Montreal. They had a $15 budget and came up with a projection of Steve Martin eating dinner uncomfortably and some random props like a broom, a stuffed dog, and a cinder block not the sophisticated theatrics of Of Montreal but just as great. It was hilarious. Not to mention that their music was incredibly fun. I highly recommend seeing them if you ever have the chance. We danced like crazy and were afraid that their show was going to be better than Of Montreal, kind of like Jamie Liddell was at Pitchfork. Luckily we were wrong.
Of Montreal started out a little rough, which was surprising because they opened with one of my favorite songs, Labyrinthian Pomp, it just sounded a little crappy and off. They followed with another awesome yet off song, She’s a Rejecter. Then, without any segue went into Suffer for Fashion, it sounded awesome. Although I was somewhat dismayed because it was as if someone had started their album at song 11, let that and song 12 play, let the album restart at 1 and then played 2 and 3. Even though songs 11-12 and 1-3 flow into each other I wanted something different. Then came a new song which featured Kevin having relations with the floor, uuhhhh…okay. I was then afraid that it would only be new songs and Hissing Fauna. After Kevin wore the floor out they went into October is Eternal, an excellent instrumental piece (that we heard at pitchfork) and he went to change.
Imagine my elation when he came back out and I heard the opening notes of Oslo in the Summertime. OH MY GOD!!! I lost my shit. That is my jam and I certainly didn’t expect it. They followed with a whole bunch of excellent cuts from Sunlandic Twins mixed with Hissing Fauna. I even enjoyed The Past is a Grotesque Animal, which is one of the two songs I don’t always listen to on Hissing Fauna. It’s much better live. I still hated Bunny Ain’t No Kind of Rider I don’t know why people like that song. It is boring.
There were a few things that I would have loved to hear. Faberge Falls For Shuggie (the only Hissing Fauna song I really would have liked to hear and didn’t although A Sentence of Sorts in Kongsvinger would have been nice (part of me almost thinks I heard it but I didn’t), Wraith Pinned to The Mist and Other Games (which I will never hear because they don’t play it in this country anymore due to the mistake of turning it into an Outback Steakhouse commercial), and one of the many adorable songs I want to hug off Cherry Peel, The Bedside Drama, or Coquelicot Asleep In The Poppies (but I never will because they have moved past that stage in their careers). After the show Monica and I looked like we had been through it. My hair was as wet as if I had just stepped out of the shower and Monica looked like she had been at one of those 100 degree yoga sessions. Neither one of us had danced like that in…a very long time. At one point in time Monica asked me if we still like Belle and Sebastian better. I said yes. I think I might have changed my mind. But I’m not sure. We then went for snacks and wrote down the set list. Here it is
Labyrinthian Pomp
She's A Rejecter
Suffer for Fashion
Sink the Seine
Cato as a Pun
Exquisite Confessions
October is Eternal
Oslo in the Summertime
Forecast Fascist Future
Gronlandic Edit
The Past Is A Grotesque Animal
Requiem for OMM2
Bunny Ain't No Kind Of Rider
The Party's Crashing Us Now
Heimdalsgate Like A Promethean Curse
Encore
Soft-core
Rapture Rapes the Muses
I Was Never Young
2. The times we had/ Oh when wind would blow with rain and snow/ Were not all bad. Postcards From Italy, Beirut.
3. I wanna bathe in milk/ Eat grapes/ Robert DiNero sit on my face. Reeling, PJ Harvey
As we walked up to The Metro and looked at the people standing in line I got a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. I didn’t just feel old, I felt really old. Damn these all ages shows! I saw at least three people who brought their mothers because they weren’t old enough to go to the big city by themselves to see a show. The average age couldn’t have been over twenty and it may have been younger. We considered not standing in line with the youth but then got over ourselves and stood. When we got inside we went up to the front of the stage and ended up talking to some kids. They were really excited that we had been at Pitchfork. We were slightly uncomfortable both with their youth and the tight proximity of folks and noticed that the balcony was mostly clear and would provide an awesome view. We decided to be more comfortable and let the kids have their fun.
MGMT was real okay. I liked one of their songs. There were plenty of fans there who liked many of their songs. I was confused. I attributed it to my age and let it go. Grand Buffet was next. When I saw a large man that looked very much like Jay McCaroll of Project Runway fame wearing a cape made out of a towel I knew this band was going to be awesome. His bandmate was a skinny man who looked surprisingly like Satan, but a nice Satan. They were utterly awesome. Their banter was hilarious and they made a lot of fun of Of Montreal. They had a $15 budget and came up with a projection of Steve Martin eating dinner uncomfortably and some random props like a broom, a stuffed dog, and a cinder block not the sophisticated theatrics of Of Montreal but just as great. It was hilarious. Not to mention that their music was incredibly fun. I highly recommend seeing them if you ever have the chance. We danced like crazy and were afraid that their show was going to be better than Of Montreal, kind of like Jamie Liddell was at Pitchfork. Luckily we were wrong.
Of Montreal started out a little rough, which was surprising because they opened with one of my favorite songs, Labyrinthian Pomp, it just sounded a little crappy and off. They followed with another awesome yet off song, She’s a Rejecter. Then, without any segue went into Suffer for Fashion, it sounded awesome. Although I was somewhat dismayed because it was as if someone had started their album at song 11, let that and song 12 play, let the album restart at 1 and then played 2 and 3. Even though songs 11-12 and 1-3 flow into each other I wanted something different. Then came a new song which featured Kevin having relations with the floor, uuhhhh…okay. I was then afraid that it would only be new songs and Hissing Fauna. After Kevin wore the floor out they went into October is Eternal, an excellent instrumental piece (that we heard at pitchfork) and he went to change.
Imagine my elation when he came back out and I heard the opening notes of Oslo in the Summertime. OH MY GOD!!! I lost my shit. That is my jam and I certainly didn’t expect it. They followed with a whole bunch of excellent cuts from Sunlandic Twins mixed with Hissing Fauna. I even enjoyed The Past is a Grotesque Animal, which is one of the two songs I don’t always listen to on Hissing Fauna. It’s much better live. I still hated Bunny Ain’t No Kind of Rider I don’t know why people like that song. It is boring.
There were a few things that I would have loved to hear. Faberge Falls For Shuggie (the only Hissing Fauna song I really would have liked to hear and didn’t although A Sentence of Sorts in Kongsvinger would have been nice (part of me almost thinks I heard it but I didn’t), Wraith Pinned to The Mist and Other Games (which I will never hear because they don’t play it in this country anymore due to the mistake of turning it into an Outback Steakhouse commercial), and one of the many adorable songs I want to hug off Cherry Peel, The Bedside Drama, or Coquelicot Asleep In The Poppies (but I never will because they have moved past that stage in their careers). After the show Monica and I looked like we had been through it. My hair was as wet as if I had just stepped out of the shower and Monica looked like she had been at one of those 100 degree yoga sessions. Neither one of us had danced like that in…a very long time. At one point in time Monica asked me if we still like Belle and Sebastian better. I said yes. I think I might have changed my mind. But I’m not sure. We then went for snacks and wrote down the set list. Here it is
Labyrinthian Pomp
She's A Rejecter
Suffer for Fashion
Sink the Seine
Cato as a Pun
Exquisite Confessions
October is Eternal
Oslo in the Summertime
Forecast Fascist Future
Gronlandic Edit
The Past Is A Grotesque Animal
Requiem for OMM2
Bunny Ain't No Kind Of Rider
The Party's Crashing Us Now
Heimdalsgate Like A Promethean Curse
Encore
Soft-core
Rapture Rapes the Muses
I Was Never Young
2. The times we had/ Oh when wind would blow with rain and snow/ Were not all bad. Postcards From Italy, Beirut.
3. I wanna bathe in milk/ Eat grapes/ Robert DiNero sit on my face. Reeling, PJ Harvey
Friday, October 05, 2007
SPINACH AND MUSHROOM ENCHILADAS
It has been a long time since I have done a proper Foodie Friday but since Monica asked me for the recipe for these incredibly delicious enchiladas I made on Wednesday to celebrate the Top Chef finale. I thoughttoday was a perfect time for a foodie resurrection. Some of you may be saying, “Wait, she has written about enchiladas before.” and you would be correct. These are not the same enchiladas though so it is ok. However, you could use the enchilada sauce recipe from the above post and be totally awesome. The reason these babies are so great is the food processor that Tony’s mom got me for my birthday. Coating the cheese in the spinach makes for the creamiest delicious fluffy filling around.
-1lb or so of fresh spinach
-1/2 small jalapeño pepper
-2 cloves garlic pressed
-½ tbsp butter
-½ white onion
-2 limes
-2tbsp cilantro
-12 small tortillas (flour or corn)
-10oz Chihuahua cheese
-1lb mushrooms sliced thickly
-2 cans enchilada sauce (I think they are about 5oz each I used red but green would also be quite tasty (or you can make some))
-Preheat oven to 450
-Place the spinach, half of the jalapeño, 1 clove garlic, half the onion, juice from one lime, and half the cilantro in a food processor. Blend until it is the consistency of pesto, it shouldn’t take long.
-Grate 7oz of cheese into a large bowl and then toss with all but about 1/4cup of the spinach mixture so the cheese is nicely coated.
-Melt butter in a large sauté pan, when hot add the rest of the onion. I sliced it into long strips and that worked very well, let cook briefly and then add the second clove of garlic, let it cook for about a minute and then add the mushrooms and the other half of the jalapeño diced let cook until mushrooms are nice and tender. Douse the entire mixture with juice of ½ lime
-Heat tortillas until soft about 40 sec in the microwave
-Coat a deep baking pan with one can of enchilada sauce
-Place about 1/8 cup of the spinach and cheese mixture on each tortilla then spoon about a tbsp of the mushroom mixture on top spreading evenly.
-Roll the tortillas and place them in the pan
-Cover with the other can of enchilada sauce and the remaining cheese
-Bake about 20 minutes
-Serve with about a tbsp of the spinach mixture drizzled over the enchilada or on the side of the plate, garnish with a small lime wedge from the ½ lime you have left over and the remaining cilantro can be sprinkled playfully over the enchiladas.
Enjoy
1. You’ve got style/ That’s what other girls say/ Satin sheets/ and luxuries so fine. Dress You Up, Madonna. Identified by Urban Chick
2. The times we had/ Oh when wind would blow with rain and snow/ Were not all bad
3. I wanna bathe in milk/ Eat grapes/ Robert DiNero sit on my face
4. She came she came to meet a man/ she found an angel/ Coocoo coocoo Barabajagal was his name oh. Barabajagal, Donovan. Identified by Monica
5. Let's have bizarre celebrations/ Let’s forget who forget what forget where. Wraith Pinned To The Mist and Other Games, Of Montreal. Identified by Identified by Monica
-1lb or so of fresh spinach
-1/2 small jalapeño pepper
-2 cloves garlic pressed
-½ tbsp butter
-½ white onion
-2 limes
-2tbsp cilantro
-12 small tortillas (flour or corn)
-10oz Chihuahua cheese
-1lb mushrooms sliced thickly
-2 cans enchilada sauce (I think they are about 5oz each I used red but green would also be quite tasty (or you can make some))
-Preheat oven to 450
-Place the spinach, half of the jalapeño, 1 clove garlic, half the onion, juice from one lime, and half the cilantro in a food processor. Blend until it is the consistency of pesto, it shouldn’t take long.
-Grate 7oz of cheese into a large bowl and then toss with all but about 1/4cup of the spinach mixture so the cheese is nicely coated.
-Melt butter in a large sauté pan, when hot add the rest of the onion. I sliced it into long strips and that worked very well, let cook briefly and then add the second clove of garlic, let it cook for about a minute and then add the mushrooms and the other half of the jalapeño diced let cook until mushrooms are nice and tender. Douse the entire mixture with juice of ½ lime
-Heat tortillas until soft about 40 sec in the microwave
-Coat a deep baking pan with one can of enchilada sauce
-Place about 1/8 cup of the spinach and cheese mixture on each tortilla then spoon about a tbsp of the mushroom mixture on top spreading evenly.
-Roll the tortillas and place them in the pan
-Cover with the other can of enchilada sauce and the remaining cheese
-Bake about 20 minutes
-Serve with about a tbsp of the spinach mixture drizzled over the enchilada or on the side of the plate, garnish with a small lime wedge from the ½ lime you have left over and the remaining cilantro can be sprinkled playfully over the enchiladas.
Enjoy
1. You’ve got style/ That’s what other girls say/ Satin sheets/ and luxuries so fine. Dress You Up, Madonna. Identified by Urban Chick
2. The times we had/ Oh when wind would blow with rain and snow/ Were not all bad
3. I wanna bathe in milk/ Eat grapes/ Robert DiNero sit on my face
4. She came she came to meet a man/ she found an angel/ Coocoo coocoo Barabajagal was his name oh. Barabajagal, Donovan. Identified by Monica
5. Let's have bizarre celebrations/ Let’s forget who forget what forget where. Wraith Pinned To The Mist and Other Games, Of Montreal. Identified by Identified by Monica
Thursday, October 04, 2007
THIS STATE I'M IN
On Tuesday I will be starting yet another phase in my career at Jobs For Youth. I will begin teaching the 8-day pre-employment workshop that we offer. I have little to no idea of what I am doing. Everyone around me is certain that I will have no problems and they are probably correct. I just like to have a finite plan for work.
Apparently, no written curriculum exists for this class. There is an outline with the topics that need to be covered and how much time will be spent on each topic. I think that it will be sufficient but I am not sure. I did get one written sheet yesterday that talked about the orientation that will be given to students on the first day. That made me feel a little bit better.
I guess that I know the material; resumes, interview questions, cover letter, thanks you letter, job applications and the like. All that stuff I am fine with. There is also a “Money Smart” component where I talk about budgeting and the benefits of using financial institutions over currency exchanges or your sock drawer. I think that section is where I am the most nervous. I certainly am ok at managing my finances but I would like a little more training before teaching others. I’m sure it will be ok though.
I also have to get everything in order for my assistant. I interviewed four people last week and my supervisor will be interviewing two of them to help with the final decision. I think I already know who will get the offer but I wanted someone to make sure I was making the right decision even though I know I am. I have never been good at making decisions but maybe I just need to man up and make things happen.
I’ll spend these next few days getting things in order with my contract to pass on to my soon to be hired Training Assistant. I am really excited about this. I have a huge list of duties of things I would have really liked to do with the grant contract but haven’t had time to do that I can’t wait for them to get started on. I also just got the grant for next year’s grant, which actually overlaps this one and the Training Assistant will get to start that one going as well. It was actually a funny process.
My contact in Springfield sent me an email with the new reporting tool for the 07-08 grant. I was very confused because I didn’t know this grant was in existence I asked my boss who told me to ask the grant guy who told me to ask the executive director. No one knew what I was talking about. I finally asked my Springfield contact to fax me a copy of the grant. There it was 82,000 worth of work that needed to be attended to. It had the ED’s signature on it from May so he must have just forgotten about it. I’m not behind at all and the requirements are actually lower than the ones for the current grant period and I know it will be well taken care of. I just wish I had been able to be even more prepared. Oh well, so it goes.
Now, back to the random songs.
1. You’ve got style/ That’s what other girls say/ Satin sheets/ and luxuries so fine
2. The times we had/ Oh when wind would blow with rain and snow/ Were not all bad
3. I wanna bathe in milk/ Eat grapes/ Robert DiNero sit on my face
4. Sometimes I feel like I don’t know/ sometimes I feel like checking out/ I wanna get it wrong/ Can’t always be strong. Ultraviolet, U2. Identified by The Doc
5. She came she came to meet a man/ she found an angel/ Coocoo coocoo Barabajagal was his name no.
Apparently, no written curriculum exists for this class. There is an outline with the topics that need to be covered and how much time will be spent on each topic. I think that it will be sufficient but I am not sure. I did get one written sheet yesterday that talked about the orientation that will be given to students on the first day. That made me feel a little bit better.
I guess that I know the material; resumes, interview questions, cover letter, thanks you letter, job applications and the like. All that stuff I am fine with. There is also a “Money Smart” component where I talk about budgeting and the benefits of using financial institutions over currency exchanges or your sock drawer. I think that section is where I am the most nervous. I certainly am ok at managing my finances but I would like a little more training before teaching others. I’m sure it will be ok though.
I also have to get everything in order for my assistant. I interviewed four people last week and my supervisor will be interviewing two of them to help with the final decision. I think I already know who will get the offer but I wanted someone to make sure I was making the right decision even though I know I am. I have never been good at making decisions but maybe I just need to man up and make things happen.
I’ll spend these next few days getting things in order with my contract to pass on to my soon to be hired Training Assistant. I am really excited about this. I have a huge list of duties of things I would have really liked to do with the grant contract but haven’t had time to do that I can’t wait for them to get started on. I also just got the grant for next year’s grant, which actually overlaps this one and the Training Assistant will get to start that one going as well. It was actually a funny process.
My contact in Springfield sent me an email with the new reporting tool for the 07-08 grant. I was very confused because I didn’t know this grant was in existence I asked my boss who told me to ask the grant guy who told me to ask the executive director. No one knew what I was talking about. I finally asked my Springfield contact to fax me a copy of the grant. There it was 82,000 worth of work that needed to be attended to. It had the ED’s signature on it from May so he must have just forgotten about it. I’m not behind at all and the requirements are actually lower than the ones for the current grant period and I know it will be well taken care of. I just wish I had been able to be even more prepared. Oh well, so it goes.
Now, back to the random songs.
1. You’ve got style/ That’s what other girls say/ Satin sheets/ and luxuries so fine
2. The times we had/ Oh when wind would blow with rain and snow/ Were not all bad
3. I wanna bathe in milk/ Eat grapes/ Robert DiNero sit on my face
4. Sometimes I feel like I don’t know/ sometimes I feel like checking out/ I wanna get it wrong/ Can’t always be strong. Ultraviolet, U2. Identified by The Doc
5. She came she came to meet a man/ she found an angel/ Coocoo coocoo Barabajagal was his name no.
Monday, October 01, 2007
DINNER WITH GERMANS
On Friday night I went for Indian food with my new work friend, Franz the German exchange social worker, Bianca a German exchange worker in Franz’s program, Monica, and Tony. We had an awesome time. The food was delicious, Monica didn’t get an allergic reaction, and we had some excellent laughs.
During dinner Tony asked Franz and Bianca if the German exchange student he knew in High School was a typical guy. See Tony had these suspicions that this guy was a total nerd. He would say things like “I am a scooter boy and scooter boys are the coolest!” while dancing the “scooter dance” He also LOVED Boney M. As Tony had suspected, scooter boys are not cool at all, particularly if they are huge Boney M fans. They are kind of like a more pathetic version of emo kids. Tony felt much better because he was certain that this guy was a wiener but didn’t want to hold these suspicions if he truly was cool in Germany. Tony also had a great moment discussing scooters when he said, “you know, scooters, vroom vroom” and the Germans looked at him like, duh of course. Tony was confused because we were also talking about some German pop sensation named Scooter and he was just trying to be clear but, in actually, Tony was the only one who was confused.
After we left the restaurant we took a short walk down Devon Avenue because Franz wanted to see what was around. I explained that it would look something like this, sari store, restaurant, jewelry store, sari store, etc. I was actually wrong because the jewelry stores didn’t start for a few blocks and instead there were little convenience stores in their place. Regardless we got the picture and decided to wait for the bus.
I asked Monica if she had read the Hillbilly article I posted that day and we started laughing at how horrible it was. Franz asked, “What is a hillbilly?” so Monica, Tony, and I let the stereotypes fly. I have never claimed to be particularly politically correct. Sure racism makes me mad and I get a good laugh out of it but I’m not above the occasional stereotype. Hypocritical? Sure, but at least I’m honest. I will also admit that we were kind of explaining white trash or rednecks and not hillbillies but we did later correct ourselves while explaining that the terms were somewhat interchangeable but not entirely.
As Tony said, “it is always okay to make fun of white trash,” Monica and I agreed. It just is. You can argue but you will be wrong .We explained that you can spot one by their plaid shirts, mesh caps, wife-beaters (cause they like to beat their wives), cheap beer, (I also learned that beer is considered food in Germany) and eagerness to call you a faggot and kick your ass. I told Franz that this last thing would particularly apply to him being male and European. Monica added that they would also probably call him British because all Europeans are British to white trash. Tony told Bianca that, as a German woman, white trash would probably expect her to walk around carrying beer steins and wearing lederhosen at all times. People at the bus stop looked at us like we were insane and they had every right to do so. Franz saw a guy in a motorcycle and asked us what kind of person he was to which we replied, “he’s just a guy on a bike,” which he was. “VROOM VROOM” was all Franz had to say about that, which was incredibly hilarious. Monica made sure to let the Germans know that you can’t always tell white trash by looking at them but once they say “hey faggot I’m gonna kick you ass,” you would know. She is right.
When we got on the bus we had to be quiet in case there were any white trash types on the bus. It appeared to be safe so we kept talking. We learned that the German equivalent of white trash is loosely translated as “land egg” I would type the German word but I couldn’t even pronounce it and Franz is gone for the day. I like the term though, it makes sense.
Now I realize that we are probably horrible people for teaching the Germans this stuff. We felt kind of like the 8th graders telling the 2nd graders bad words but it was so incredibly funny that we couldn’t stop. ot that Franz and Bianca are like second graders but, you know what I mean. I’m sure that someone will call me a faggot and kick my ass any day now for payback. That will suck.
During dinner Tony asked Franz and Bianca if the German exchange student he knew in High School was a typical guy. See Tony had these suspicions that this guy was a total nerd. He would say things like “I am a scooter boy and scooter boys are the coolest!” while dancing the “scooter dance” He also LOVED Boney M. As Tony had suspected, scooter boys are not cool at all, particularly if they are huge Boney M fans. They are kind of like a more pathetic version of emo kids. Tony felt much better because he was certain that this guy was a wiener but didn’t want to hold these suspicions if he truly was cool in Germany. Tony also had a great moment discussing scooters when he said, “you know, scooters, vroom vroom” and the Germans looked at him like, duh of course. Tony was confused because we were also talking about some German pop sensation named Scooter and he was just trying to be clear but, in actually, Tony was the only one who was confused.
After we left the restaurant we took a short walk down Devon Avenue because Franz wanted to see what was around. I explained that it would look something like this, sari store, restaurant, jewelry store, sari store, etc. I was actually wrong because the jewelry stores didn’t start for a few blocks and instead there were little convenience stores in their place. Regardless we got the picture and decided to wait for the bus.
I asked Monica if she had read the Hillbilly article I posted that day and we started laughing at how horrible it was. Franz asked, “What is a hillbilly?” so Monica, Tony, and I let the stereotypes fly. I have never claimed to be particularly politically correct. Sure racism makes me mad and I get a good laugh out of it but I’m not above the occasional stereotype. Hypocritical? Sure, but at least I’m honest. I will also admit that we were kind of explaining white trash or rednecks and not hillbillies but we did later correct ourselves while explaining that the terms were somewhat interchangeable but not entirely.
As Tony said, “it is always okay to make fun of white trash,” Monica and I agreed. It just is. You can argue but you will be wrong .We explained that you can spot one by their plaid shirts, mesh caps, wife-beaters (cause they like to beat their wives), cheap beer, (I also learned that beer is considered food in Germany) and eagerness to call you a faggot and kick your ass. I told Franz that this last thing would particularly apply to him being male and European. Monica added that they would also probably call him British because all Europeans are British to white trash. Tony told Bianca that, as a German woman, white trash would probably expect her to walk around carrying beer steins and wearing lederhosen at all times. People at the bus stop looked at us like we were insane and they had every right to do so. Franz saw a guy in a motorcycle and asked us what kind of person he was to which we replied, “he’s just a guy on a bike,” which he was. “VROOM VROOM” was all Franz had to say about that, which was incredibly hilarious. Monica made sure to let the Germans know that you can’t always tell white trash by looking at them but once they say “hey faggot I’m gonna kick you ass,” you would know. She is right.
When we got on the bus we had to be quiet in case there were any white trash types on the bus. It appeared to be safe so we kept talking. We learned that the German equivalent of white trash is loosely translated as “land egg” I would type the German word but I couldn’t even pronounce it and Franz is gone for the day. I like the term though, it makes sense.
Now I realize that we are probably horrible people for teaching the Germans this stuff. We felt kind of like the 8th graders telling the 2nd graders bad words but it was so incredibly funny that we couldn’t stop. ot that Franz and Bianca are like second graders but, you know what I mean. I’m sure that someone will call me a faggot and kick my ass any day now for payback. That will suck.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
