I’m sitting here eating this “eating right” bar of the peanut butter crisp variety and I am really wishing that it was a Tiger’s Milk Bar. It almost tastes like one but it isn’t. When I was young, I would go on trips to Sears with Mom and Sisterhead and we would go to this section where there were treats and I would get Tiger’s Milk Bars and this absolutely divine red licorice that I think was slightly raspberry flavored and it had a panda on the box. Sears, like many of my childhood memories, is Sepia toned. The yellowish nature of the memory could also be due to cheap fluorescent lighting. I have no recollection of what was around this section of the store but I do remember shelving and these brightly colored treats staring at me from the dull metal shelving.
I wonder if Mom had other reasons for going to Sears. Was there generally other shopping involved? Did we just go there for Tiger’s Milk Bars and Licorice? Was it even Sears? Were there other treats that I don’t remember as well? Luckily, Mom reads the blog so she can probably answer some of these questions.
The building that was once Sears isn’t anymore. I don’t know if it is anything. I don’t know if it is even standing. I don’t know much about how the old neighborhood looks. Whenever I go home I rarely stop by. There isn’t much there and what is there makes me a little bit sad. I remember driving past the condo where I lived from age 2ish until right before my 10th birthday. I turned into the alley and everything looked so sad. It was dirty, silent, and empty. It wasn’t the way I remembered it at all. I remembered running though the “yard” and down the sidewalk with friends. I remembered hiding throughout the complex and all the friends Sisterhead and I had living nearby. It didn’t look like the place I played.
The house we moved into after leaving the condo is where my parents live today. It’s a happy place. The yard is lush and green, there is a garden. There are trees I used to climb and it looks better now than it ever did before. When we moved there, Sisterhead and I didn’t want to go. We loved our new house but there was something about the old one that was special. Sisterhead was born there. I had my first room that was all my own there. Our friends were there. I never really hung out with the neighborhood kids at the new place. Sisterhead found a few friends there but it wasn’t the same. Then again, I was a teenager and playing tag in the backyard didn’t have the same feel to it. There were different things to do and the world was larger.
Now that I am older the world seems small again. Going home doesn’t seem to take too long and when I get there things are just where I left them, but with some minor changes. My home in Chicago seems closer to my parent’s house than my parent’s house seems to the old neighborhood and Sears. I guess that is just part of life changing.
1. Horses in my dreams/ Like waves like the sea/ They pull out of here/ They pull they are free
2. Oh here we go again/ It’s time for the same arguments about/ About that and a little bit of this
3. What about the time/ You were rolling over/ Fell on your face/ You must be having fun
4. Unexplainable things will happen when we really see into each others eyes/ Right/ So why is it we rarely find the time to see each other in the eyes
5. You consider me the young apprentice/ Caught between the scylla and charybidis/ Hypnotized by you if I should linger/ Staring at the ring around your finger. Wrapped Around Your Finger, The Police (well actually it was a Tori Amos cover but have The Police version too and it is by them) identified by Katrina