DOGGONE IT

I have been tagged with a Stuart Smalley Meme that Blog Antagonist created. The theme of the meme is, of course, “I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and doggone it, I like me. You have to list ten things you like about yourself. Being a somewhat self-deprecating person (although not so much on my blog) I found this a very hard task. I actually thought about just not tackling it at all for fear of not coming up with ten things. I will come up with ten but some might be pretty stupid. The ten things can be physical, mental, or whatever. Because I’m not all that brave, mine are going to be more mental or whatever than physical. I’m not all that proud of the physical right this second.

1. I have the ability to be truly empathetic. I don’t always use this ability because I can be a bit of a jerk but when it is needed I can empathize with the best of them. People often define empathy as the ability to imagine going through what someone else is going through and thereby understanding their feelings. That only scratches the surface. To truly empathize you have to deeply understand the other person because the way they feel about the situation depends on all their personal history, which is obviously different from yours and see how having their life experiences would change your opinion of the situation. Let me give a real clear cut example. Someone is in a hysterical fit because they misplaced and lost twenty dollars. You imagine losing twenty dollars and can see yourself bummed out and upset and depending on the week maybe slightly stressed but you aren’t in conniptions. Then you look at that person’s situation, they have three children no food in the refrigerator, the rent is due and the power is about to cut off. That twenty means a lot to them. I think empathy is a term many people take very lightly but to truly be helpful to someone you have to take it deeper.

2. I am funny. I’m no comedian and if I set out to make someone laugh I will probably do embarrassing dances or mediocre funny faces and not be all that successful. However, just as far as general conversation goes I tend to be a little bit funny. I think the people who really like me think I am more than a little bit funny. I’m not as funny as some; Monica and Tony have me beat hands down on that one. But I am funny. I also have the ability to pull funny out of bad situations (always remembering that some bad situations can’t be turned into laughter cause of the whole empathy thing) and that can be a good thing.

3. I take care of others before taking care of myself. I realize this is not necessarily a good thing in general. There are times when it can be downright detrimental to my personal wellbeing. Yet, it is something I really take pride in myself for. Not to say that I am never selfish because that would be a lie. I just try to care for those who really need me as much as I possibly can. I think that is one reason I tend to keep friends for a long time.

4. I have a nice smile and I use it. People tell me about my smile all the time and I would have to agree. I am a big smiley cheeseball. I like to see other people smile and me smiling is part of that. I like to see people happy.

5. I’m a thinker. I like to listen to many different ideas and take them all in and think about them and decided which parts I like and which parts I think are suspect. I like to write about what I think about and I often don’t share those thoughts because they are relatively difficult to articulate. I like to think about the nature of reality and humanity, the balance of nature and machine. I think about things I know are true and will impact the world and I think about the mystical and the magic that is surrounding us all. Thinking rules.

6. I am content. Like taking care of others first, this can be a dangerous one. Contentment can lead to apathy and that is never good. However, I have spent so much of my life not being content that it feels incredibly good to say that I am.

7. I like my feet. My feet are incredibly ugly as far as feet go but I have grown to like their grossness and oddities. I like them because they are small and shoes look good on them most of the time. I like them because they have memories and battle scars from everywhere I have been and everything I have done. I spent years and years hating and being scared of all feet (many of you already know this) and I no longer fear toes. Some toes I even like.

8. I trust my instincts and I don’t regret my decisions. If I have a gut feeling about something I’m going to go with it and I’m going to be right. I think that I know what is best for me in the long run and that I’m not going to sabotage myself or do things that I don’t want to do. My decisions often defy logic but I am ok with that. If I feel something is right I have to go for it. I certainly have steered myself in wrong directions before but I have always learned something from going the wrong way and that is ok.

9. My taste in clothes truly reflects me. Back in the day I dressed in a way that I thought would make me “cool” or make me fit in. By Jr. and Sr. year of High School I was pretty much over that. Once I went to college I didn’t look as strange as I did in High school because everyone at Sarah Lawrence is kind of a freak. Since college I have calmed down somewhat and settled more into myself and my clothes have calmed down as well but some days I know it is time for a Mushroom Dress. I’ll take friends opinions into consideration but when something is right for me it just is right and I have to go with it.

10. In general, I’m a cute girl. Sure, half the weight I lost last year is back and I’m none to pleased about it but at least it isn’t all back. I think I’m relatively well proportioned even though my proportions are bigger than ideal. I like my face a lot and I have nice hair that goes boing. People think I am younger than I am (although not much younger as they used to) and that makes me smile. Cute is a just fine thing to be.

Ok that was incredibly difficult. By thing 5 I thought I was pretty much done with everything and I had to stretch a little (see #7) but after finishing I kind of want to smile. I’m not tagging anyone with this. It is just too hard. However, if you want to do it you should. I will admit that you may feel pretty happy with yourself when you are done.

I forgot my iPod at home today!!!! Oh No!!!! so I can’t add any new songs to the shuffle. Here is the one still unguessed from yesterday.

1. These are the games that we employ/ I am a girl and you’re a boy/ No matter what you said to me/ I didn’t have the energy.