THE THINGS A COMPUTER CAN DO

A long time ago I decided not to put a stat counter on my blog because I didn’t believe I was technically capable enough to do it. Then I realized that I would have to be a complete idiot with no hands or feet not to be able to do it so I did. I love my stat counter. I am slightly obsessed. I think that it could become a huge problem for me. I have always liked graphs, facts, figures, useless information, and randomness. The stat counter combines them all. I wish I had done it a long long time ago.

Yesterday I found a friends computer and was able to deduce what she was doing on it by looking at the length of time she spent on the page and my deductions were confirmed. I felt real special, like a secret agent. I also realize that most people who end up on my blog don’t stay all that long, which is ok by me because I am sure that my almost interesting musings aren’t at all interesting to many people. I can deal with that, it makes sense. What I don’t understand is why some people spend over an hour on my page. I admit that I am happy about their interest. I just don’t understand it. At all. I’m only almost interesting.

The country breakdown is also interesting. I knew I had visitors from all over but I didn’t know how much all over. I’m talking about places like Brazil, Malaysia, and Ireland. I knew I had visitors from the UK but not Ireland, and there were a few.

As any of you people with a stat counter know, the search results that bring people to your page are always incredibly interesting and often hilarious. Surprisingly, about 75% of the searches that brought people to me were about figure skating. Granted, when I talk about figure skating I really talk about figure skating but I only did it twice. I’m sure more will come after Nationals this month and Worlds in March but it obviously isn’t my main thing. My favorite search was “Ironman racist lyrics”. Last I knew, Ironman didn’t have racist lyrics but apparently the site that comes up after mine talks about a sir-mix-a-lot song called Ironman that apparently has some racially stereotypical lyrics. Who knew? I thought it was funny that my page came up before the one that obviously answered their query but whatever. “Natalie, I love you, I love you, I love you” was also a nice search. I guess there are a few songs by Natalie’s that have those lyrics in them as well as my many posts about things that I love. Actually, a lot of things got to my page because of song titles or lyrics, which makes sense since I include them on every post. I was flattered to know that if you google the first line from “Little Red Corvette” my blog is the first page you will come upon. I am second in line for “King Herod’s Song” and, as a lover of musicals, which is also a big deal.

For the past two weeks we have been instructed to wear orange and blue on Fridays in support of our Chicago Bears. Most people wear their Bears gear or don’t wear any orange and blue at all. I have no Bears gear but still wanted to show my support. Last week I wore my Orange “Super Dad” shirt with blue lettering. Today I am wearing my Mets shirt, which is particularly hilarious to me. One other person found it funny so far but it is only 10:30. I truly hope that my awesome levels of “spirit” help the Bears get to the Super Bowl. It would be nice. Someone else just told me in a mean voice that I was wearing the wrong team. I explained it was the best I could do and she looked at me crazy. What?

Songs To Aging Children, Joni Mitchell- When I first started to really listen to Joni Mitchell I was in high school and I had a morbid fascination with this song as I felt I was certainly an aging child. I was far too dramatic for my own good. I think it applies more to me now than it did then. Not that I am anything but an adult (although occasionally that could be debated) I just think I understand it better now.

Rise, Public Image Limited- Oh how this song reminds me of “The Rules of Attraction,” the movie not the book. Monica and I watched this movie A LOT for a while. I never thought I would be such a fan of a movie staring Dawson but this movie is fantastic! If you haven’t seen it you should stop reading this silly blog and haul tail to the video store. There are so many priceless scenes in this film that I can’t even begin to think about them. THE NAME IS DICK!

Astro Boy, The Dwarves- I don’t think this song has anything to do with the cartoon Astro Boy that my Mom loves so dearly. I think her face on Christmas when she opened Astro Boy was almost as adorable as my face when I opened Jabba The Hut after a good 15 years of wanting it.